well here goes....
i have necer done this before and kinda feel wierd about it but hopefully someone out there can give me some advice that will actually help
i will also try to keep this as short a posiable but give enough info that you can help me
My fiancee' is my absolute dream come true....there is no doubt about that in my mind.but with that said here is where i am having problems..
first of all part of the problem is me, i have lived a very rough and and not normal life growing up and even since then really. i mean some really terriable things have happened to me, that really i won't go into here other than to say that they have happened. I also am not using that as an excuse for any actions that i may have ever had just that it is part of who i am
when me and her first started and honestly up untill a few months ago things were perfect...she was (and is) my life and she made it seem as if i was hers. she ahd two children wich never did concern me and dosn't now
i mean absolutly perfect....we would close the bar where she works and dance alone to the jukebox untill the early hours of the morning and sometimes even with no music..you know just being together....i would massage her every night......write her love letters and poetry all the time...i would do the laundry and house work so that we had time to spend together when we were off instead of doing chores....
i would plan special nights just for the two of us so that we had time to grow together etc......
but it always seemed and especially now that i was never doing enough and all that special time was only important to me
we don't really have relations together anymore unless in some way i make her feel guilty for not doing which i don't do intentionally but it happens when we are talking
anyhow she used to call me al the time just to say hi and stuff and would always ask that i come to the bar and help her close so that we could spend more time together
then suddenly she got mad and asked me to stop comeing to the bar and so i did
but she did ask that i stay up and wait for hwer to get home and i did every night but then she started coming home later and later and yeah i won't lie i thought something was going on
and now today she says that she wants a break.....she says that she loves me with all her heart and doesn't want me to leave and part of that is because of how much i mean to the kids but that she doesn't understand why she treats me so badly and wants a break from me to try and figure it out.
to me that sounds like she wants to be free to run around and act single while i work and stay home and take care of the kids it treally does sound like to me that she is or is going to run around and cheat ( but it's not cheating if we're on a break???)
while i sit at the house and wait for her to come to her senses
she has never made special plans for us and and acts like spending quality time with me is an inconvience to her schedule
maybe i'm just crazy what do you all think
