I really don't think this is a gender based issue. It's a dead-beat vs. parents who actually love their children enough to step up and do the right thing vs. take whatever they can from their ex.
I divorced 9 years ago...have 3 kids...we divided assets equally which meant I kept the house (and higher mortgage) and he got lots of cash...which he put down on a small house, bought a sailboat, 2 jetskis, a new car...cashed in his 401k and redid the house, bought a new tv (even though he took our only one) list goes on...never paid child support...I was paying over 1k a month in daycare. I agreed in court to 1/2 of the state required child support %. He still paid nothing.
he married 2 months after we divorced took on a stepson and had another baby...my eldest will be 18 this month and he feels sorry for his dad...about how I have a big house, etc. and his dad is out of work and struggling (he starts a job and quits because he does all the work while the bosses make all the $)
My son shows a lot of anger towards me because 'i threw his dad out in the streets...took all his money...' I finally sat my son down and explained how things were divided when we divorced. It's too late...he believes everything that comes out of his dad's mouth and feels sorry for him. Just last week he said his dad is thinking of buying a new boat and write it off as a corporate expense but at the same time is asking if I will pay for all of his college because I can afford it and his dad can't.
I know I could take him to court, but I also know he would feed the kids more lies and make things worse for them, so I've just put up with it. I also feel bad for his wife, who is a really good person and works really hard and I wouldn't want to make things worse for her.
It's flippin ridiculous.
