stevewsc

well it was a rocky day yesterday. let me start off by saying it sucked. but i got a new found sence about us. i didnt want to call her yesterday mrning but i had this overwelming urge to so i did. well we talked for a sec and she was really nice and said that her sister was keeping the kids lastnight and that she had to work tomorrow. well we talked about them and school for a little then we hungup after she told me she almost at work. well i jumped in my truck and went to the house. well i noticed new sheets on the bed. so i pulled the covers back and there was a mans t shirt balled up. so i am guessing it is his and he was either there lastnight or she had been sleeping with it all along. she used to sleep with mine when we met when i had to work late. well i went through some drawers after noticing a shot glass in the sink. well i found an empty half pint of liquor. so i know she is still seeing this guy and she is still drinking. well i left and i came home and i sat here thinking. i said i am going to text her and see if she wants to go to dinner and a movie tonight to see what she says. well i did. she said no. i asked if we were done and she said yes i think so. i cannot ever trust you again. i told her i cant trust her either cuase i got her phone and found out the truth about shawn. she said i know about your friend too. so she has everyone thinking that i am messing around on her i guess. anyway i forgot to mention my neibor. when i left the house the day before after droping the house payment off she was up the road and we talked about things. she said she would watch the house when she was home and let me know if he was comming around. and told me she didnt love me if she moved on that quick. well i left. well yesterday morning i passed her again and i stopped. she said i talked to jennifer yesterday. she said she told me that she caught you running around on her with another girl! i said what! she steve i dont believe her i just wanted to let you know what is telling people. so i think its best now just to forget about us and worry about my daughter. there is no sence in wanting someone who doesnt want me. being lied to on a daily basis. being put down. only to have my heart broke many times in the last 2 months. its just not worth it. i feel i have done everything in my power to try to make this work. what scares me is in two or three months she comes running back. i dont know if i will have the courage yet to tell her no. so what i am going to is start dating. i want to see what the world has to offer. i know there is someone out there who will have more respect for me than her. i just dont understand her. i work, i make college level money, i pay all the bills, i take care of my children 80% of the time, i beg for affection but dont get any, i just dont know that she will ever be happy in life. the thing that scares me is my baby girl. jennifer is cut from the same cloth as her mother. she is actually worse about lieing and manipulating than her mother. i do not want my little girl to be brought up that way. it is a scary thought. thanks for all the support people. why dont we listen to people when the tell us the best advice in life? LOVE is a very powerful word and alot of people use it to their advantage. i will keep everyone posted on my progress............steve