Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

oregonmom · 06-08-2012, 08:04 PM

I had an interesting theory that came to me, and I wanted some unbiased opinions on it. My womanly mind could be way off base

BTW, for those of you who know my story, I am not asking this thinking it is the issue. I know the major issue is that I'm a doormat and H is a selfish addict. But I was thinking this may be a small side note.

Women often say they want a "nice" (beta) guy. Yet, in the dating world, beta guys seem to get stuck in the "friend zone", and many male BSs here seem to be beta guys. Women THINK they want a beta guy, but always end up going after the alpha ones.

I have always had a lot of male friends, and I hear things like this often: "I wish we had more in common", "I wish she showed interest in the game", "It drives me crazy how long it takes her to get ready", "I wish she would initiate sex"

That woman is me. I've always been a bit of a tomboy. I have "male" interests (sports, fishing, camping, etc), the game and Sportscenter is manditory viewing, I look nice in 30 minutes flat and I initiate sex probably 50% of the time. In the dating world, I was usually in the "friend zone", but my H saw those things as a plus. Our compatibility is off the charts.

This brings me to my theory - can men THINK they want these qualities in a woman, but actually grow to resent them, kind of like women with the beta vs alpha man?

Thanks for the thoughts!!

06-08-2012, 08:04 PM	#1 (permalink)
oregonmom Member Join Date: Jan 2012 Posts: 166	Question for the men I had an interesting theory that came to me, and I wanted some unbiased opinions on it. My womanly mind could be way off base BTW, for those of you who know my story, I am not asking this thinking it is the issue. I know the major issue is that I'm a doormat and H is a selfish addict. But I was thinking this may be a small side note. Women often say they want a "nice" (beta) guy. Yet, in the dating world, beta guys seem to get stuck in the "friend zone", and many male BSs here seem to be beta guys. Women THINK they want a beta guy, but always end up going after the alpha ones. I have always had a lot of male friends, and I hear things like this often: "I wish we had more in common", "I wish she showed interest in the game", "It drives me crazy how long it takes her to get ready", "I wish she would initiate sex" That woman is me. I've always been a bit of a tomboy. I have "male" interests (sports, fishing, camping, etc), the game and Sportscenter is manditory viewing, I look nice in 30 minutes flat and I initiate sex probably 50% of the time. In the dating world, I was usually in the "friend zone", but my H saw those things as a plus. Our compatibility is off the charts. This brings me to my theory - can men THINK they want these qualities in a woman, but actually grow to resent them, kind of like women with the beta vs alpha man? Thanks for the thoughts!!