Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

martino · 05-13-2008, 01:36 AM

Swedish please chime in here...it's now 3:30 am I cannot sleep and am puzzled as to what I should do. So Sunday night she makes sure our son is occupied, comes up stairs and tells me, "lets make this a quick one, I don't know how long he will self entertain" well he's done fine in the past I think to myself but ok, 15 min later were done and I casually follow her downstairs and boom she quickly sits down an un pauses "Survivor", so I get mad when I realized that this quickie was most likely based around "Survivor." Again, I feel like a John to my own wife.

This is an example of a long running complaint i've had, and she doesn't seem to do anything about it. She will deny and deny this and did (that it was about Survivor) I will sometimes mention to her in argument that she sure seems to put more effort into her friendships with her girlfriends than us. One in particular she has been close friends like sisters since very young, I truthfully believe she is a lot more open to her than will ever be to me. When I bring this up, she gets furious and denies it but I believe in looking at people's behavior to evaluate thier internal state...don't we all?

If you at all believe in Astrology google: Leo/Virgo in love, it describes us perfectly. "She is rigid, keeps to self, well organized andmechanical,calculating,passive/agressive" "Him,
flamboyant, artistic, tyrant, confrontational, in search of dreamy love" so we don't mix perfectly, but 10 years of marriage accounts for something right?

So now i'm considering a couple of approaches: 1. To back way off and only give what she gives to the relationship. 2. Same but not tell her that I am doing so. 3. To confront her and demand either she go to therapy with or without me and come back with reasons why she puts me off, understands my needs but doesn't care enough to act, figure out why her head is engrossed in constant non stop reading of novels, or I guess figure out if she even wants to stay married. 4. Just plain ask for a divorce.

Tell me what you think,

Thanks,
E

05-13-2008, 01:36 AM	#8 (permalink)
martino Registered User Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 9	Re: Don't know what to do Swedish please chime in here...it's now 3:30 am I cannot sleep and am puzzled as to what I should do. So Sunday night she makes sure our son is occupied, comes up stairs and tells me, "lets make this a quick one, I don't know how long he will self entertain" well he's done fine in the past I think to myself but ok, 15 min later were done and I casually follow her downstairs and boom she quickly sits down an un pauses "Survivor", so I get mad when I realized that this quickie was most likely based around "Survivor." Again, I feel like a John to my own wife. This is an example of a long running complaint i've had, and she doesn't seem to do anything about it. She will deny and deny this and did (that it was about Survivor) I will sometimes mention to her in argument that she sure seems to put more effort into her friendships with her girlfriends than us. One in particular she has been close friends like sisters since very young, I truthfully believe she is a lot more open to her than will ever be to me. When I bring this up, she gets furious and denies it but I believe in looking at people's behavior to evaluate thier internal state...don't we all? If you at all believe in Astrology google: Leo/Virgo in love, it describes us perfectly. "She is rigid, keeps to self, well organized andmechanical,calculating,passive/agressive" "Him, flamboyant, artistic, tyrant, confrontational, in search of dreamy love" so we don't mix perfectly, but 10 years of marriage accounts for something right? So now i'm considering a couple of approaches: 1. To back way off and only give what she gives to the relationship. 2. Same but not tell her that I am doing so. 3. To confront her and demand either she go to therapy with or without me and come back with reasons why she puts me off, understands my needs but doesn't care enough to act, figure out why her head is engrossed in constant non stop reading of novels, or I guess figure out if she even wants to stay married. 4. Just plain ask for a divorce. Tell me what you think, Thanks, E