| | He doesn't see what I really need
I just can't sleep tonight. I'm so upset that my Husbsnd doesn't see what I really need even though I've voiced it in so many ways. I feel like he I just give snd give snd he asks for what he needs snd after that he just goes to sleep. I'm do depressed tonight that I can't sleep and I can't stay in bed, on our last night together. He's leaving early early tomorrow morning to work in another state. He has no safe that he's coming back for a visit.
What I need is sex and since he's leaving, I'm not going to get it for months on end. His love language is touch too, but not for sex. Tonight he wanted me to touch his back and rub him. He likes me to look for any skin perfections, I don't know why he likes me to check his skin. He does rub my leg while he's doing it but nothing else.
I want to touch him somewhere else. Last time we had sex, I didn't get to touch his penis or even look at it.
He's very very reserved too. When ever he's gone away for work in the past he has never done phone sex or video sex. We have all technology to do it. Part of the reason last year I was driven to have an online affair was because of his turning me down for sex.
I can't tell him how hurt I am for me giving him what he said he needed because he's going to be gone for a long time...and me not getting what I needed even though I even at first told him no because I won't get what I need. I'm so hurt they I can't breathe. I'll probably tell him sometime once he's gone and settled and working
I don't even want to sleep next to him tonight even though tonight is the last night that I can. I just feel too hurt and I can't hold it in, I don't want to keep him up all night with how I feel when he has to drive 12 hrs tomorrow without me. I know he's going to notice that I'm gone and be hurt and he's going to flash back to when I had the affair before he knew what was wrong then way back in July and August last year
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