Originally Posted by anchorwatch
Joe, I don't like it at all, but that's me. My wife with another man, over night, no communication, no electric, while she is trying to get over a depressing event. Why not with me??? This comforting event should shared with me, not another man. That slope is too slippery for me.
I can understand your mind set that if she cheats, she cheats and there's nothing you can do about it. But I wouldn't be party to to her being in a situation where something could happen. I know my wife wouldn't either and she'd be disappointed if I'd allowed it. Those are our boundaries. I'm not jealous, I'm protective.
Hope she finds peace with her Mom's passing.
My daughter will be there as well, the other part of this that I forgot to mention is that my wife wants to get her away from her stupid boyfriend for a while. Daughter is 17 and has been dating this LOSER for well over a year now. He's lazy, selfish, and needy, they fight constantly, and nothing would make us happier than to see her move on. My wife thinks a change of scenery would do her some good as well and I agree.
Point taken to being a party to something happening, but where do you draw the line with this mindset? I'm not home all day and she is, if they had something going on they could very easily pull it off while I was at work anyway. Same goes for when my band is playing, I'm so absorbed in entertaining the crowd that they could be in the parking lot doing whatever and I'd never know.
If my daughter wasn't going, I'd have to voice opposition, even though I wouldn't be worried about it, it wouldn't look good for me to condone it. This would be a boundary as you stated.
Thanks for the kind words about her mom, they were very close. Watching her succumb to lung cancer was very tough to watch.