Originally Posted by Gaia
no... i said adding the spice (cherries, sprinkles, ect) would be in my mind.. equivilant to trying new things with JUST your partner... and adding another person would be like adding another cake.. then adding sprinkles and such to that would be including them on things your trying with your partner... such as bondage ect... and yeah i do see adding another person to the relationship as using them as a tool which is another reason why i find it wrong. If feelings for this other person develop then the relationship between a couple isn't so stable anymore now is it? Therefore that relationship isn't so committed and could very well fall apart.
Oh...sorry for the missunderstanding. I read you wrong. Now, I'm going to focus on the OP's orginal topic.