Originally Posted by Cosmos
I'm saying that if my partner was no longer interested in having sex with me, yet finds the idea of having sex with other women attractive, I wouldn't want to be with him.
I would want the truth - no matter how painful.
You wouldn't want him to go to counselling first? Even if despite his feelings his actions were honorable and he was working on restoring his attraction?
Because honestly, every marriage goes through this, to some extent or another. When you are married, your attraction to other people doesn't go away and if it does well then you have to deal with the exact same problem (unfulfilled sexual needs) but from the other side of the coin. However if he is flirting, or escalating contact with other women, well then yeah he is stepping outside marital boundaries, in which case divorce becomes one reasonable solution, but I have not seen from his posts that he is acting inappropriately towards his W, just that he is having a hard time exercising self control over his thoughts.