fuserleer

ok all that makes sense to be honest.

I would say that when we met, I certainly ranked higher than her. But through our lifestyle, her's has probably risen to match mine. However, she can't live anywhere near that lifestyle now, so perhaps her rank is starting to fall, and mine is beginning to rise due to my actions.

What I'm confused on now is the next step, as in, she doesn't want to move back here, but she does actively want to give all this a go once she has her space. How do I take control of that?

I've heard from people, that she really doesn't like the idea that I am out and about, she's afraid I'm going to meet someone, then I'm lost for good no matter if she resolves her problems or not. She keeps asking me about it, and I keep being blase "yeah Ive got tons!" "of course, who could resist me"

What do I want, I'm still unsure, I think about the work involved here and I just ACHE! But then I think about what we had and I ache just as much, because there does seem to be a possibility that it can all be retrieved.