| | Re: I want to die right now
I have a female friend that had her first orgasm, with her husband of 20 years after her 43th birthday's party. She already had given up but then started paying attention at her body, her reactions and boy... she claimed had become a sex addict (she was as normal as the next door girl), she started using toys, reading about the G-spot, positions, she nearly killed her husband for a solid year before things started to calm down. Sadly there's a high proportion of women who never had it in their lives.
What's the diference between the being friends after divorce and reconciliation? Being friends means he doesn't risk his heart again. Staying married means he has to put himself in the cross line again, enduring who knows for how much time very little trust, the uncertainty of being burned again next time you decided to drop your boundaires. Then there are many, many things like justice, pride, further emaculation, gossips, family influence, shame... Maybe he thinks he could reconcile if he was able to fight those things and if you manage to make him believe you can "affair proof" yourself (I always felt insulting this "affair proof" the marriage concept, there's not such a thing because it doesn't involve personal responsability). You are young, have no children... the idea of starting fresh is way more appealing.
From the things you wrote I believe he still loves you, he's obviously attracted to you, he's even putting effort in pleasuring you and is being rewarded for it, can see a future...?
I'm sending positive vibes ahead so you have your chance at reconcilliation.
Maybe he's trying to clean you up of OM?