Oh Manny, hang in there! Don't know about your W, I just know that I often felt growing up at home that my Mom could be a really controlling wench sometimes (anonymity is great online
). She was and is extremely organized, but this went to the point of having to take my shoes off at the door when I came in (I still do at my home now, no biggie), and then I had to carry them to my room upstairs. She could not stand having shoes next to the door. Sometimes (she had issues too) she would be all pouty and *****y, and no one knew why...eventually she would come out with the shoe situation.
So it wasn't easy for me or my brother, and i can imagine for my Dad and in his condition it was pure torture not knowing if what he was doing was right or not, and what consequences it could have. I never really thought about how hard that specific situation must have been / must be on him until you talked about your situation.
I know that my Dad deals with a lot of stuff on his own, but he does talk to me and to a friend of his. Just talking to someone who knows your situation and has some understanding for it can help. Do you have anyone around you to whom you can really honestly talk? If nothing else, look for support online (as you are wisely doing!)
Here are two sites that might help more than we can, although I always have an open ear (eye)!!!! Bipolar Disorder, Manic Depression Surviving Bipolar; The Fastest Growing Bipolar Site Online! Forums, News, Information and more Free!
As I said, hang in there and good luck with the new upcoming ride!