Originally Posted by Racer

Sorry, I'm a romantic... A marriage to me is a "union of two souls". So there is a significant degree of giving up thoughts of 'self' and it is replaced with thoughs of 'us'.

In friendships, 'self' is maintained and the relationship is conditional on mutual benefit on a much more limited basis. Like having a drinking buddy, but he's not your goto guy for relationship advice, etc. In a marriage, your spouse is your goto for everything and valued.

And I do admit this is more of romantic fantasy than a reality. So I treat it like a goal I want to achieve and work for without really expecting it....