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Old 07-13-2012, 04:21 PM   #12 (permalink)
EleGirl
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Default Re: Guys who are divorced. How bad did you get hit financially?

I am a woman who has been the breadwinner most of my working life. I understand your fears. I got a divorce in March of this year and dogged a huge bullet.

I understand the concept of spousal support and believe that there are cases where it is warranted. For example in the case of a women who stayed home for 25 years as an agreement of both spouses. She has no education beyond high school and no job experience. She’s 50 yrs old. It’s going to be hard for her to start a new career, not impossible but hard. Or for a spouse who is disabled.

IMHO, it’s the responsibility of every person to be self-supporting. So in MOST CASES I believe that spousal support should be rehabilitative only.

Your best bet is to go see an attorney and discuss this. There are no set rules. From what I've read for FL at 12-14 years alimony is probable. At 15 years it's almost definite. But there are things you can do to mitigate this.

How old are your children? Are they in school?

If you work paid overtime regularly cut back on your overtime. That way support will not be calculated on overtime.

Tell your wife that she needs to start working because you guys cannot make it on your income alone (does not matter if this is true or not), get her out there working. If she cannot find a job then get her to go back to school for a Master’s in something that she can actually earn an income at. For example being a physician’s assistant.

When she’s back in school have her take out student loans to pay for the school. Student loans are not community debt. She will have to pay those off herself. From my experience never/ever pay out of your own pocket for your spouse’s education. They are most likely to divorce you once they achieve their new level of education… it goes to their head.

With the house, the equity will most likely be split 50/50.

You want to make sure that you start doing as much with your children as she does. This will help you win 50/50 custody and greatly reduce the amount of child support.

If you have a joint account with your wife, start now by reducing the amount of money you put in that account with each paycheck. Have some go to an account in your name only.

Who pays the bills in your home? You or her? If she pays them start getting very involved in your bill paying. Do you know how she is spending money right now?
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