wren

I'm feeling stronger tonight.
J asked me to lunch. I asked him how the last few days alone felt. He said he missed me. That is the 1st time since the separation that he's said that without me asking first. He also said for the 1st time he let himself feel lonely. He did a lot of resentment work and said he's ready to share it in therapy on Tues. I asked him if he's still angry with me and he said no. He said that he's mad at himself more than anything. And when I told him that I wish he's forgive himself and I love him. He said he feels unlovable.
I talked to him more about how I feel he needs to decide whether he wants to commit to a life with me or commit to a life without me. He says he's scared to make a decision because he has no faith in his abilities. And that he fears he's inadequate. I can't help him feel better about himself. I told him that I can't live another 6 months in limbo. He understands and says I deserve so much better.
He wants to read Chapman's, The Five Love Languagesafter I read the section on love is a choice. He seemed receptive. He actually cried a lot in front on me today. So, he's feeling again. Tuesday, during our session, I hope we can discuss how love is a choice.