| | Physical attraction, fitness, sex, etc
I love my wife to death. I am just curious is anyone has any advice on the following...
I teach Brazillian Jiu jitsu and grappling for MMA, so fitness has to be a huge priority. For me, it is easy to be in optimum shape because I enjoy what I do and have never found working out a problem. Also, I don't eat processed foods, drink soda or beer, don't really enjoy sweets, etc.
I don't expect my wife to be as diligent as me. I think she is a beautiful person but really doesn't try to look her best. She doesn't find it important because she is "fine". It has been a huge distractor in our marriage because I can't get her to see where I am coming from. Its not so much the end result as it is the effort. She knows what I naturally find attractive and doesn't try to acheive it because its not a big deal to her. She will admit that I look far better than I did out of college. I didn't work out and wasn't training back then. However, she can't see the other side that I think its totally sexy for a spouse to really work on something for the other person, no matter what area of life it is. She said she got it once upon a time, but seems to have forgotten. I want her to understand my point of view. I am not like some guys who will belittle and I don't want her to try to be a model. I want her to be healthy most importantly and I don't think she cares about her own health as much as I do. Again, I am looking for effort because she knows its important to me, even if I don't bring it up at all any more.
I am just frustrated that I do a lot I don't like for her and this one area has really affected our sexual and overall relationship. Thanks for any advice.