Originally Posted by Enginerd
To the OP: You mentioned that your husband reads between the lines and you do not. Does he tell you what he's expecting and how he feels all the time? Is he always the one to inititate relationship talk? I'm wondering how often you bring up relationship issues and if your husband thinks your timing is bad when you finally do it? I'm selfishly asking these things because I'm hoping that we might be able to help each other understand our spouses.
My wife has a hard time reading what's behind my emotional state. Her's either for that matter. She isn't able to anticipate what I'm going to think or do while I can accurately predict what she'll say and do in most situations. I mean after 20 years you tend to know a person. In a nut shell she isn't the most sensitive person when it comes to understanding emotions. She's a very nice person and good mother, but since I never get any meaningful feedback from her I've begun to stop trying. I'm a bit hopeless for our marriage and it sounds like your husband may also be at this point. Its not a good place to be.
I think you're hitting the nail on the head with your comments. He always seems to be able to 'predict' behaviors, sometimes as if he expects the worse. I don't often bring up relationship issues because it usually turns into an argument and I'm the wrong one. When I point out his similar behavior, my concerns aren't as relevant so they don't get any kind of traction. I dont pick that battle to fight anymore.
I've tried giving meaningful feedback. But it doesn't seem to him to be warranted. So that leaves me with no real outlet except to do EVERYTHING that makes him happy so that I can be happy again.