Plan 9 from OS

For some reason the wife doesn't respect you and looks at you more as a caretaker as opposed to a lover. Based upon what was told to you in the e-mail you received from her male coworker, I'm guessing that your wife may be having an affair right now. You should try to confirm this. If she is not having an affair, then you need to stop taking on most of the responsibilities within the house and to let her start seeing a little more "reality".

A good place to start would be to stop cooking dinner. When supper time comes, look over at her and ask her what are we having for dinner? Then you need to start slowly reducing whatever chores you are doing around the house until you hit a point that is more equitable between the two of you. Basically you need to pull a 180 with your interaction with her. If you are normally fawning over her, become aloof. If you normally talk to her about her feelings, become more aloof. Also, start working on yourself to stop being a doormat. Learn to stand up for yourself and stop taking any crap from her.

By any chance, do you think it possible that your wife simply looks down on you because you are a "redneck"? Did your wife come from a rural background too or did she grow up in a metropolitan area? I am suspecting that there is a "class" warfare dynamic here where she is either ashamed of your "redneck" traits or other people are making fun of you to her because you are not like "them".