Originally Posted by aug
Sometimes the most satisfying way to leave is to keep it simple.
Expose to everyone first to prevent her spinning the story. Then to her just say "I know you havent stop, so as I told you the last time, I'm leaving you now."
Then leave and go dark on her. Do not reveal your sources. You may need to during the divorce, but that's a while away.
Definitely do this! And not your idea Texas. I am like u, I want to throw it at them, make them face it, tell them what I am doing. Make them change. It does not work. Don't get sucked in! INFORMATION IS POWER.
If you tell her all u have and how you got it, you think she will throw herself at your mercy and say sorry and how awful she has been? Maybe she will - but it sounds like he is ignoring her? Has he found out she is lying to him too (you had a mutual.friend and he is sick of her stringing you both along) and has dumped her? There4 she may well cry and beg. But only because she will have lost both men. She won't be genuine if she shows remorse, you know it, and when you leave her she has all the information she can twist and manipulate to her hearts content. How horrified will she be, and others when she tells them, that you had Var in her car and secretly recorded her. People won't know why, she won't tell them. This is not an acceptable every day kind of thing (it is on Tam, but not out there in the real world) People will just think you are weird and a paranoid freak. People don't understand the situation and are not clued up.
Not giving her all will hurt her more. And you regain some power back in your relationship.