Originally Posted by valtys
I guess I have nothing else to do but keep trying. I admit to being discouraged at this point. For instance, the SONAR idea is fascinating, but in this case, her personality is so not conducive to it working. I can say something, and unless it is directly relevant to what we are doing at the moment (which in the case of Sonar, should be when we are heading out of the house), she won't internalize it and ponder it.
The SONAR idea is the best technique I know. Coupled with my other technique of paying very close attention to everything she says. You should at least try it several times before you write it off.
The other thing you can do is tune up your own behaviour. Although the general tone of the article does not cover your case, this article has several categories that if you fall into, would indicate work you can do on yourself: Sexless Marriage?