Originally Posted by SomedayDig
Damn dude...sorry to hear that horrible story. Unfortunately, that image is gonna be with you for a long, long time. While I never saw my wife and her xOM together, my imagination - which can sometimes be worse than real life, has played these mind movies for me often since I discovered her 5 year long affair on 3/6.
I agree with Complexity. She might be happy with you but it seems like she pole vaulted over the boundary line...and not just this time. Since they're friends of yours, the "innocent" flirting has probably been there for a while. It might seem like no big deal...I mean, everybody does it, right?! Yes. To a degree.
But booze and flirting is a dangerous combination. Matter of fact, it's how my wife met the xOM. At a party.
And it started with just a kiss.
I'm glad you caught this quickly, though I'm saddened that you had to actually see it with your own two eyes. Read a lot of threads here about infidelity. Some are gonna be worse than yours and others might not seem so bad. Learn.
Also, look for the book "Not Just Friends" and read the "newbie" post at the top of the Infidelity section. Both are a tremendous resource.
Oh...and make sure your wife reads this stuff too. You BOTH need to be fully on board to reconcile.
Thanks for the input. I figured that image would stick with me. I have to learn to cope with it, because that's going to be a big part of my ability to reconcile.