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Anxiety, Depression and Relationships Marriage and relationships are difficult by themselves, but coping with anxiety and depression can make them even more challenging.

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Old 06-27-2009, 09:51 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default I feel like it is my fault

So like i mentioned in my other post. My husband and i have been married for about a year and he has been in and out of jobs. I know its hard times economically but its the same excuse every time. Our sex life has taken a dive because i am so stressed and i honestly dont feel attracted to him anymore because i always feel like crap all the time. I cook, clean and do everything around the house and he never does anything. But he thinks its ok to go to his friends house and screw around while i just do everything for him. I dont know what to do. We moved to a different state for a new start about a year ago and i have no family out here and hardly any friends because i work too much and never have extra time Please help
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Old 06-29-2009, 03:14 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: I feel like it is my fault

If he'd not working he should be helping around the house more.
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Old 07-11-2009, 08:39 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: I feel like it is my fault

It sounds like you're his maid more than his wife.
My situation is very similar.... He wants sex when he is home, but he can't stick around to help with the dishes!

You can't help but stress out about everything because he doesn't seem to worry about anything.

You need a break.. perhaps a mini vacation back home?
To a family members house or friends....
Some place where you don't have to be "in the situation" and you can think about what you need to do.

If you love him and want things to work out then you need to lay it all out and tell him how you feel. If he truely cares, he will try harder. But if you're still unhappy even after - then you have some big choices ahead of you.

Good Luck!
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Old 07-12-2009, 10:06 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: I feel like it is my fault

Why don't you two split the house chores? You shouldn't be the only one doing the work if you both live in the home.

Is it possible that maybe he feels you nag him and that's why he dissappears to a friend's house? If that's the case, then maybe instead of asking him repeatedly to chip in, how about you ignore his dishes, ignore his clothes, don't pick up after him (you get the idea). Yea, it seems childish, but I do this with my fiance. We don't live together, but I'm at his place very often, sometimes weeks at a time. Some men keep their bachelor pad messy, but my fiance takes it to another level. his bathroom and kitchen are DISGUSTING, and those two I clean before I use them. His living room is messy, but I rarely sit in there so it doesn't really bother me. Try another method, you might get the results you're looking for.
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