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Anxiety, Depression and Relationships Marriage and relationships are difficult by themselves, but coping with anxiety and depression can make them even more challenging.

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Old 11-14-2009, 11:57 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Wife says she needs space

I dont know what to do! its been a week now shes been gone. She says she needs "space." I know that could mean she wants out, but I asked her if thats what it was and to tell me the god honest truth. and she didnt say she was and she didnt say she wasnt she just said she needs space. Our marrige has its ups and downs like every other marrige. But I know I messed it up. We got into an argument and I got mad and let my ego get in front of me. I called her a ***** in front of my nephew a few times and I told m nephew not to ever marry a ***** in front of her.....I know its pretty fd up. If you would know it the next 2 days she was gone, saying she needs space. I love her and want to be with her and I dont know what to do I apologized and promised to change and I really have changed in the past week. She tells me she doesnt feel much of anything and she does have problems right now financially and her brothers girlfriend is about to loose the baby that they will have. What should I do? I know to give her the space she wants but I cant wait til she comes back if shes coming back. Thank you all for the help
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Old 11-16-2009, 10:21 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Wife says she needs space

What else happened prior to the latest? You don't generally need space over a one-time thing. You need it after repeatedly putting up with abuse or after a long time in an unhappy situation.

How long have you been married? How old are you both? Where is she staying?

Also, a week doesn't indicate change. It may be a good beginning, but since she isn't there to irritate you and you aren't under the same circumstances, you shouldn't be surprised she isn't exactly impressed with your proclamation of great change.

You have no choice but to give her the space she has requested in the manner in which she has requested it. So if she has asked you not call, don't call, etc. By not giving her what she requests, you are showing a lack of respect for her need for space. It works against you.
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Old 11-17-2009, 03:15 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Wife says she needs space

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Originally Posted by Nowitzki2004 View Post
Our marrige has its ups and downs like every other marrige. But I know I messed it up. We got into an argument and I got mad and let my ego get in front of me. I called her a ***** in front of my nephew a few times and I told m nephew not to ever marry a ***** in front of her.....I know its pretty fd up.
Is this the first time you've acted out in this way or is this the straw that broke the camel's back?

If my husband said this to me I would be thinking he doesn't think much of me and I deserve better than this.

Unless your nephew is an adult, that is a horrible role model and I hope you apologized and talked to him when you calmed down.

If your ego and anger has been an issue in the past, you may want to consider anger management...that would porbably go further in showing your wife you are serious about changing.
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