Re: My husband is "confused"
My H was like this in the beginning of our marriage. He wanted me to drop my issues with the marriage for the sake of being positive. But of course nothing in the marriage bothered him because he wasnt even emotionally in the marriage.
I dont think you should stay positive if you dont feel positive. I never did. i think i was in a bad mood for four years straight. I cant pretend to be happy. it would really bother me when he seemed so nonchalant about how i felt. i wanted him to be bothered like me. but after awhile, and doing some boundary books, i realized that if he felt ok, then i couldnt judge him for that. I had to take care of my problem, since it seemed it was solely my problem at that point.
I decided that if he wasnt going to work on the marriage, i wasnt either. i threw away every marriage book i owned, and all my lingerie. i started picking up my own hobbies and basically ignoring him. it only took him six months to realize it. and even that was only semi-effective. But, i am happier and that is what i was going for anyway.
"I'm a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality."
- Bryon Katie