SuzyQ64

UPDATE. I filed for divorce before Thanksgiving. After much soul-searching, I told him I wanted out via email. Before everyone jumps on me, this is a man who avoids confrontation at all costs (as I posted earlier, he TEXTED me that my father-in-law died), anyway, although to many of you it sounded like the coward's way out, but I thought it was better for him. I'm a pretty face to face kind of person and I did tell the kids face to face. He had time to digest it and after a few days sent me an email back telling me he just wanted me to be happy. Whatever--I guess I am not worth fighting for. SO the ball is finally rolling and in about 45 days it will be done. We have to figure out property division and I am not in a big hurry to clear out the house and get money from the sale of the house. I am not sure that he can afford to live in the house, and I am still paying some of the bills there. The house payment is pretty small by today's standards. You just have to work to pay for it. My son had to move back home after his roommate situation blew up, so maybe he can help pay the bills--he makes more money than my husband (my son is a server). I am so ready to move on, I would rather have NOTHING than this half-life where no one even converses with me and just uses me to clean and pay the bills. If you are living in a situation like mine--GET OUT! Life is way too short to live like that. The next guy will be someone who has a real job and knows how to cook and clean--and yes, FIGHT. As I have said before, the opposite of love is indifference, and I am done with it. We are going the mediator route, since he cannot afford a lawyer and we will probably do a lot of the property division via email. Christmas was rough--I was asked (at the last minute--AFTER I had bought all of his families gifts and made a pie) to not attend because I would make too many people "uncomfortable." Well GUESS WHAT--THEY will miss ME a whole lot more than I will miss them. I know that sounds egotistical, but I'm finally figuring out what I am worth and I'm worth a heck of a lot more than indifference and people feeling "uncomfortable" at my presence. I bring a whole lot more to the table than my soon-to-be ex. PLUS now he has the added bonus of being a victim all his life because I told him via email.

SuzyQ64

Also my younger son has chosen to live with me. And for now my husband is too proud or whatever to get alimony, 401K or any of that stuff. It is going too well am scared something will happen, but it is only money, if I could only get the time back that I have wasted.