Had enough balme thrown at me

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 07:45 AM

Just moved over from coping with infidelity forum. (Wife had an affair). Finally had enough last night and am going to file for divorce. I could only take so much blame, and she can't except much. Just ready to move forward. My anger is deep in the fact that she was not willing to commit to trying to work on our marriage. Not sure what happens now, but with the help of all of you that are going through or have been through this and the advice of my lawyer, I know I can get through this.

MrQuatto · 09-15-2011, 07:50 AM

We are here for ya hardtime. Every step, no matter how hard, moves you away from the past and toward the future. Just keep walking man

Q~

Ten_year_hubby · 09-15-2011, 09:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hardtime

My anger is deep in the fact that she was not willing to commit to trying to work on our marriage.

Did she have a reason for not trying? Are you not willing to work on it by yourself?

Jellybeans · 09-15-2011, 10:00 AM

Hardtime, sorry you find yourself here. Did you express to her you want a divorce? If so, how did she react? Is she still having an affair?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ten_year_hubby

Did she have a reason for not trying? Are you not willing to work on it by yourself?

It takes TWO to work on a marriage/to make a marriage/to put forth the effort. One person alone cannot sustain a relationship.

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ten_year_hubby

Did she have a reason for not trying? Are you not willing to work on it by yourself?

Brings up everything from past. Nothing about her affair. Just had enough, time to make me happy again

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 10:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jellybeans

Hardtime, sorry you find yourself here. Did you express to her you want a divorce? If so, how did she react? Is she still having an affair?

It takes TWO to work on a marriage/to make a marriage/to put forth the effort. One person alone cannot sustain a relationship.

I haveseveral times, but finally have had enough. When she gets the papers, and might want to work things out, I am still willing to try, but alot has been said and done. Don't know if I can do it, but again willing to try

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 10:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrQuatto

We are here for ya hardtime. Every step, no matter how hard, moves you away from the past and toward the future. Just keep walking man

Q~

Thanks. I really appreciate all on this site for emotional support and advice.

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ten_year_hubby

Did she have a reason for not trying? Are you not willing to work on it by yourself?

Her reason is she needed time apart to figure out if she still has feelings for me (BULLSH!t) I tried by myself, but her wall is to high. Am tired of being hurt.

Jellybeans · 09-15-2011, 10:20 AM

Is she still having an affair?

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 10:22 AM

As far as PA, I don't think so, but am sure that EA is continuing

Jellybeans · 09-15-2011, 10:54 AM

Then you are right to cut it off.

As long as the affair is active, you have no marriage.

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 11:04 AM

I have an appt with lawyer tomorrow.

MrQuatto · 09-15-2011, 11:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hardtime

I have an appt with lawyer tomorrow.

Hardtime, there is no rule or law anywhere that says you can't get back together if she wants to put the effrot in. A divorce can be stopped and hell, you can even get back together after. But it seems she wont make any effrot until there is no other choice, and that is only a small chance at that.

The time is here to focus on Hardtime.

Q~

Jellybeans · 09-15-2011, 11:49 AM

I agree with Mr. Q.

hardtime · 09-15-2011, 11:56 AM

I know, but I agree. small chance.