Originally Posted by Trying2figureitout View Post
What do you like about him?
Just reading doesn't sound like you two should have married.
Might want to end it an find a real husband who loves you for you.
I liked him because he was different from my parents. He let me do things that I enjoyed without always telling me "no" or that I couldn't. He never tried to control me. In the early parts of our marriage, he would hold my hand or walk close to me. Early on, even when his parents were around and he walked ahead of me, he'd still look back to see where I was and come walk aside me.
Now... He still lets me do what I want. If I had to wait to do something that interests him, I'd be staying home every single day of my life. When his parents are around, it's all about them.
I'm not saying I want him beside me 24/7, but its the little things that he used to do.
The fact that anytime we talk about "future" stuff, he always says he never wants to talk about it. I just want to be done w/ this and he can go do whatever he wants. He can go back to China or stay in USA and live full time w/ his parents. Good luck finding a girl that will be "gun-ho" on that. I think his parents staying w/ us for 6 months really pushed our relationship (or what was left of it) over the edge.
He wonders why I'm not more "wife-like" or give him s*x at the drop of a dime. He also had told me to Google "how to be a wife". I wanted to tell him to Google "how to be a husband". Well, I'm thinking if you never appreciate me or try to have some interests w/ me... what makes you think I want to have s*x w/ you? Or am I selfish saying something like that? Then he says he sees no hope that I will change (why do I have to change, whats to say he has nothing to change either?) so he doesnt want to have kids. Little does he know, I dont want to have kids w/ a man that doesnt appreciate family expect for his own. He basically said he doesnt want his next generation to have any of my mom's genetics.
I think we married too soon before really knowing each other cuz if I knew all this beforehand, I probably wouldn't of. Before I didnt know what I wanted... now, I know what I want in a man. He tells me that I'm not a bad person or dragging him down, but I need to change for the good. I cannot change the way I grew up. I cannot change my parents. I cannot change the fact that I'm mostly american culture not chinese culture.
Am I wrong to think like that?