11-27-2011, 03:30 PM
Join Date: Nov 2011
| | need some sound advice
I have been married for nine years and three weeks ago my wife said she wants a divorce. she say's she has never felt a connection. I haven't been the best husband, I must admit but there has never been any cheating on my part. I have been blind to my wifes needs after for nine years and didn't realize it until she was done.
My wife has had a hard life and is in therapy right now. Actually she was doing sand therapy and said she felt different after that session. Her therapist doesn't agree with what she is doing. In a nutshell she has never experienced any freedom and say's she wants to be selfish for now, and is seeing someone. She realizes that asking me to be her best friend is selfish.
She thinks that if she lets me back in we'll be in the same spot in six months, and she doesn't trust me emotionally, and feels nothing for me romantically for me. I'm ashamed of myself for never loving my wife the way a woman should be loved, and I was never the spiritual leader in our relationship. I have seen the error of my ways and want to be a real husband-and yes it took me nine years! Will I truly redeem myself here by sticking by her side, and crying my eyes out, feeling ripped apart (feeling what she felt for 9 years)? Also, she says she's not filing papers out of respect for my feelings. We also have an adopted three year old who knows that there is something going on.
Please ask any questions-I need real advice