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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-01-2011, 12:05 PM Thread Starter
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Question Pregnant and considering divorce

I really could use some advice. I am currently 5 1/2 mo pregnant with our second child and am seriously considering divorce. We have only been together 3 years and married since April. My husband is a narcissist to a t and always promises he will change the issues he needs to change but never does. Our relationship has been based on a lie since the beginning. He lied about still being married but they were in the midst of a divorce (I found out from his mother), I have caught him many times sexting other girls and trying to hookup with other women. He has caused me to go into major debt, which hasn't helped that I haven't been able to get a job in almost 3 yrs to try and get out of debt. Last year he started using cocaine and I had to find out after he pawned all my important stuff, from my best friend, that he was using, then he promised he would stop and a month later I caught him using again. He now has a drinking problem, which he doesn't think he does. He doesn't drink all the time but when he does he can't stop and drinks himself into oblivion. He gets verbally abusive when he is confronted about things and always blames me for the problems, that I keep bringing up the past, but it's not really the past for me because he continues to do it. I don't want our daughter and soon to be son to grow up the way his other 3 boys did with a bad father. There are so many other issues he has, but to many to post, I just don't know what to do anymore. He has flat out told me that there is nothing wrong with him. Oh and to top it off, I have the mother in law from hell that her baby can do know wrong, it's always the womans fault, I have had to hear from her how I am a mooch and need to get a job (even though I take care of 6 kids when his boys are with us) and I am no good, but to my face she acts like a saint... I am at my breaking point and could really use some good advice.
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-02-2011, 09:26 AM
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Re: Pregnant and considering divorce

Oh dear, you really need so give yourself a break! This sounds awful. If you're not ready to leave for good/ which i think you should, when nothing's changing/ then at least you should leave to give yourself a rest, and for the baby's sake. Tell him you need time to sort things out. May be it will be good for him too, to finally see his life without you.
Best of luck!
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-02-2011, 10:11 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Pregnant and considering divorce

I have been moved out since August for the 5th time but recently we had tried to be together for couple weeks and he told me he would go to AA (which he did a couple times) and all this other crap and when I get to his house over the holidays not only do I catch him drinking but he lies again to my face about it. That is when I told him I wanted a divorce and came back to my mother's house. He gets all mad at me and then threatens to get custody of our daughter and all this other bull and then the next day acts like nothing has ever happened. And through all these years not once have I ever gotten a sincere apology from him.
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-03-2011, 12:10 AM
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Re: Pregnant and considering divorce

Leave. Do not go back. Protect yourself and the baby. I don't think he'll change.
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