Lost phone, suspicions, crazy making, please help!
I'm 64 years old and husband is 68. We've been separated for a year.
We are not legally separated, just living separate. We still love each other, but there were issues in the marriage and we both felt we needed to have time separate and then decide what to do.
We've had MC with 3 different counselors, and I've had IC but he has not.
I recently came to Washington state to be with my sons for awhile, whom I've not seen in many many years. H was fine with me leaving. He's in New York State.
He's retired and so am I.
There's a lot to share, but I wanted to get to one situation that's really really hurting me and confusing me tonight.
We talked on our cell phones Saturday afternoon, he said he was going to go visit his brother who he's not seen in several months, and that he would call me when he got home.
I never heard from him at all Saturday night, or all day Sunday.
I tried calling his cell, but it kept going to voicemail. So I thought maybe he didn't want to talk to me. I called several more times Sunday evening, but same thing, it went right to voicemail.
What's strange is that just recently within the last two weeks, we been seriously talking about me leaving Washington to come back to New York state and possibly try living together again.
Things were actually getting better between us, and he had sent me several cards in the mail and a few gifts, and when he left messages every day it was very loving and uplifting.
When Monday came and I have not heard from him I became worried, he has had two small strokes in the past, and he lives in the country where there are not a lot of neighbors.
On Monday afternoon I called the local police and asked for a wellness check. They called me back about 30 minutes later and said he was there and he was OK, and that he had lost his phone.
My husband used the police's phone to call me but I was in the bathroom and missed his call, he did leave a message and said he lost his phone and that as soon as his pension went to the bank he was going to buy a new phone and would call me.
His pension is in the bank on the last day of every month, which would've been today, which is what he said on his message, that he would buy the phone today and call me.
It is now 8 o'clock in the evening in New York State, and I have not heard from him.
There are several things that are not making sense to me.
His phone is quite large, I don't see how he could have lost it, you would think he would have had to put it down somewhere or it fell out of his jeans, which being that large he would've known.
Of course I've considered the possibility that he left it at a strip club, a massage parlor, a hookers apartment, or someone he seeing. I have to consider every possibility.
If any of the above happened, you would think he would have gone back to see if it was there.
I know this may seem trivial to some, but this is eating away at me and I've been very upset all day, crying here and there and just sick to my stomach thinking the worst.
I would welcome any thoughts, opinions or ideas about a "lost phone".
Of course there is more to our history, such as he cheated several times on his first wife, this is his second marriage and the second marriage for me. And no I'm not the woman he cheated with.
He's very insensitive to my feelings, he has very little empathy for me, and can be very cold at times.
Because we've been apart for one year, there has been no sex of course, he has admitted to watching porn and masturbating, which I've excepted only because I'm not there, but I don't like the idea.
Also in his past, he has visited hookers and while in the Navy he used prostitutes.
Of course that was many many many eons ago, and as far as I know while we were married, he was always faithful to me.
So with all of that, please tell me what you think. I'm a nervous wreck and having a very bad night.
Thank you all ....