He lost respect for me. - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
Considering Divorce or Separation If you're considering divorce or separation, this is the place to talk.

User Tag List

 49Likes
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #16 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-15-2017, 02:02 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 196
Re: He lost respect for me.

I agree with everyone above.

He has his degree in philosophy and now he thinks that you and him do not have anything in common and that he is better than you.

What are your common interests?

He will cheat on you if he already hasn't because he needs intellectual stimulation and he does not feel that he is getting it from your relationship.

You do not need to change.

According to him, he is now a different person and he wants out. 13-28 is a good long run, but peoples personalities and minds continue to develop and 27 is around the time when you stop growing and your values and desires are settled.

The relationship is over. Part ways peacefully, mourn your relationship and find someone else when the time is right.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

xMadame is online now  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #17 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-15-2017, 02:15 PM
Member
 
jb02157's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,346
Re: He lost respect for me.

Whether he's cheating or not he's certainly not doing you any good. Let him contemplate his future on someone elses's dime. I think that it's insulting that he wants you to read when you get home after a 55 hour week.

"I've paid double for every transgression I've ever made and that motel and that boat are little to ask for"
jb02157 is offline  
post #18 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-15-2017, 02:31 PM
Forum Supporter
 
SunCMars's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: North Coast Nationalist-burg, U.S.A.
Posts: 2,820
Re: He lost respect for me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondilocks View Post
What I see is a guy who has a master's in philosophy (which is pretty useless) and works at a coffee shop. He is blaming you because he is feeling unfulfilled. You can't fix that. It isn't yours to fix.
: grin2:

Mark..........Twain....three meters deep, Bosun!

Madame Captain! We are in uncertain waters!

Shut up Bosn', I be steering!

.................................................. .................................................. .................................................. ....................

HollyHobby

He has outgrown you.

He will not outgrow this life. It will starve him out.

Let him go.

This....This is the nub of the stick that pokes me in the eye when the light of day energizes my optic nerve....SunCMars.... The Allegory of the Cave--> On this, I did a '180' and stepped out.

The Lion in Winter. Invictus..By Will, Shall... Saved from harm by my friends.
SunCMars is online now  
 
post #19 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-17-2017, 08:59 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Illinois
Posts: 91
Re: He lost respect for me.

Hi,

Cut down to 35-40 hours a week. He is throwing a impolite need request and doesn't know how to phrase it to get your attention. He should say I miss you and need you more, then tell you exactly what he is feeling and needs without criticism. He can make a complaint and an offer for you to turn towards him and get reconnected. Give him some romance regularly. I will turn around and make your together time a priority. If not getting along try throwing out a line that diffuses the stress and if he has any decent emotional intelligence he should pick up on your life line to correct and reconnect again to you. If he doesn't get it say it again or show affection if it is appropriate. Read up on Gottman Ph.D. Plus the proper feeding of husbands is a good thing to read. A man should read it too. It is by Dr. Laura Schlessinger.
Your issue is very fixable.
Davidmidwest is offline  
post #20 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-17-2017, 10:16 PM
Administrator
 
EleGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 33,765
Re: He lost respect for me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Davidmidwest View Post
Hi,

Cut down to 35-40 hours a week. He is throwing a impolite need request and doesn't know how to phrase it to get your attention. He should say I miss you and need you more, then tell you exactly what he is feeling and needs without criticism. He can make a complaint and an offer for you to turn towards him and get reconnected. Give him some romance regularly. I will turn around and make your together time a priority. If not getting along try throwing out a line that diffuses the stress and if he has any decent emotional intelligence he should pick up on your life line to correct and reconnect again to you. If he doesn't get it say it again or show affection if it is appropriate. Read up on Gottman Ph.D. Plus the proper feeding of husbands is a good thing to read. A man should read it too. It is by Dr. Laura Schlessinger.
Your issue is very fixable.


The book "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" is written for women who are SAHM's who are not very sensitive to the needs of their husbands. The OP does not fit that criteria. She is married to a man is the more like the women that book was written for.

Surviving An Affair -
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.



To Create A Passionate Marriage -
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
EleGirl is online now  
post #21 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-17-2017, 10:18 PM
Administrator
 
EleGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 33,765
Re: He lost respect for me.

Hollyhobbie,

I'm writing to check in on your. How are you holding up?

Surviving An Affair -
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.



To Create A Passionate Marriage -
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
EleGirl is online now  
post #22 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-17-2017, 11:46 PM
Forum Supporter
 
Satya's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 2,764
Re: He lost respect for me.

OP, you should ask him who the new, intellectually stimulating woman is.

"If you deliberately plan on being less than you are capable of being, then I warn you that you'll be unhappy for the rest of your life."

~ Abraham Maslow
Satya is online now  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Is it a lost cause? TryingAndFailing General Relationship Discussion 7 06-08-2016 09:36 PM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome