Re: Are you happy you left? happy you stayed?
I appreciate what you're saying here. I've told him over and over in last 2-3 years how unhappy I am. It often comes with false promises and a "this is just what marriage is like" attitude. I'm done asking for change.. I'm going to take charge now.
We almost separated last year, and I agreed to give it another shot. He told me he'd go into counselling, become more socially active, be a "better sport" (he's very negative and miserable in general) All of which hasn't happened. I started IC around that time, and he never went to his.. he just wants me to stop being unhappy and just accept that this is life.
I refuse to accept that this will be my life.
Good for you. It will be hard but people survive this and go on to thrive. Based on this info, I think if you don't leave you will deeply regret it. From your first post I thought everything was fine other than you just didn't feel butterflies in your stomach when he entered the room.
BTW, regarding your original question, I have stayed in a similar marriage. One difference being that now that I have learned things about marriage through websites like this, I'm much stronger and better at asking for what I want and my husband is being a much better partner and I am feeling love come back into our relationship. But while I am happy with our relationship at this moment, I deeply regret staying. I believe I could have found someone much better suited for me had I understood relationships and what my needs really were and put the effort into it. I love my husband, but I could have loved someone else too. Now I'm in my early 50's with no children and no savings because I stuck it out.
Last edited by WorkingWife; 03-16-2017 at 03:31 PM.