Hello all. I'm not the forum type but I really needed a non-family, non-friend point of view on this.
A little background on my situation. My wife and I met during my senior year in high school, her sophomore year. We instantly fell for each other upon meeting each other. We did not spend as much time together as we should have during our dating phase, but only because we always seemed to find ourselves apart due to me being in college the following year. I dropped out after my freshman year, we had a very good and passionate summer together, and she got pregnant as a senior in high school. We were married a week after our son was born (I was 19, she was 18), and we moved to Oklahoma, then West Virginia, and are about to go back to our hometown in North Carolina.
At first, things were good in the marriage. Overtime, a lot of things changed. We found that we could not be honest with each other without hurting one another. We have two different senses of humor. I am a passionate, outgoing person who loves to have fun and keep things fresh. She is more laid back and reserved. I have a very strong sex drive, and she definitely does not. We both get easily annoyed with each other, and we find that it is getting harder and harder to get along with each other. The only things we both have in common are that we both work decent jobs full time (I am a retail department manager and she is a daycare assistant) and our undying love for our son.
Over the last two years (we will reach 4 years in July) I just feel so unfulfilled. We argue on an almost daily basis, and they are hardly ever about anything substantial. We both have long days at work, and then we get home and stress each other out more. We fight over chores (I do most of them because she would rather watch tv than help maintain a clean house). We both grew unhealthy and out of shape, but while I have decided to place more of an emphasis on health and physical maintenance, she does not participate in my goals for healthy eating and exercise which makes it harder for me to maintain my own health. My sexual desires have been largely unmet. We are not very affectionate with each other. We are very loyal to each other, however.
I have brought up my unhappiness before. We try to negotiate, but it never pans out. I have suggested professional help, but she really has no desire to seek help. She always says "I don't complain, you shouldn't either." Honestly, if it is just going to continue like this I think I would rather head in a difference direction, even if it means doing it by myself. I am not placing all of the blame on her. Marriage takes two people. But we can never seem to find mutually beneficial solutions to our problems, and I grow weary of the same cycle of arguing, then being mad at her, then being mad at myself, then ignoring the problem, then doing it all over again. Am I wrong for considering divorce?
A little background on my situation. My wife and I met during my senior year in high school, her sophomore year. We instantly fell for each other upon meeting each other. We did not spend as much time together as we should have during our dating phase, but only because we always seemed to find ourselves apart due to me being in college the following year. I dropped out after my freshman year, we had a very good and passionate summer together, and she got pregnant as a senior in high school. We were married a week after our son was born (I was 19, she was 18), and we moved to Oklahoma, then West Virginia, and are about to go back to our hometown in North Carolina.
At first, things were good in the marriage. Overtime, a lot of things changed. We found that we could not be honest with each other without hurting one another. We have two different senses of humor. I am a passionate, outgoing person who loves to have fun and keep things fresh. She is more laid back and reserved. I have a very strong sex drive, and she definitely does not. We both get easily annoyed with each other, and we find that it is getting harder and harder to get along with each other. The only things we both have in common are that we both work decent jobs full time (I am a retail department manager and she is a daycare assistant) and our undying love for our son.
Over the last two years (we will reach 4 years in July) I just feel so unfulfilled. We argue on an almost daily basis, and they are hardly ever about anything substantial. We both have long days at work, and then we get home and stress each other out more. We fight over chores (I do most of them because she would rather watch tv than help maintain a clean house). We both grew unhealthy and out of shape, but while I have decided to place more of an emphasis on health and physical maintenance, she does not participate in my goals for healthy eating and exercise which makes it harder for me to maintain my own health. My sexual desires have been largely unmet. We are not very affectionate with each other. We are very loyal to each other, however.
I have brought up my unhappiness before. We try to negotiate, but it never pans out. I have suggested professional help, but she really has no desire to seek help. She always says "I don't complain, you shouldn't either." Honestly, if it is just going to continue like this I think I would rather head in a difference direction, even if it means doing it by myself. I am not placing all of the blame on her. Marriage takes two people. But we can never seem to find mutually beneficial solutions to our problems, and I grow weary of the same cycle of arguing, then being mad at her, then being mad at myself, then ignoring the problem, then doing it all over again. Am I wrong for considering divorce?