He actually put that I deserve permanent alimony. I know that everyone is right about my husband and I know in time ill be good. But I am just emotionally busted. This is the perfect way to explain how I feel...... We love our children correct? Well imagine that you have been told by your parent for 27/28 years how much you love them and then one day they tell you , I don't really love you I just told you that because that's what a parent tells his child. This is what has been done to me and everyday I struggle with the words and the affection that I received from this man who thinks because he has told me his truth that I can just say oh okay don't worry Ill be fine we can still be friends. I don't think so, as far as I'm concerned he is just as bad as someone who's physically abusive. He has left me mentally abused how cruel could you be to be so affectionate and loving and then tell that person oh I did that because this is how a husband treats his wife. I would not do this to anyone, lie to them and lead them to believe a love that was not true. My son told me the other day that he was not made in love because that is how he interprets what he heard his father say to me. I told him to never say that again because when he was created it was out of love because I love him to never think that. I also told him that his father loves him too. My heart is in pieces not only for myself but for my children. I feel like I have taken some steps backwards but I know I must be strong for my family. Thanks for the support.
Dear 28years, your pain is normal. Your loss is huge and so is the loss for your kids. The only crazy one is sadly your WS. Allow the pain to wash through you, the man you love and loved you is no more. The wonderful father your children had is no more. That man is gone and more than likely never will return. Please protect yourself financially while mourning this huge loss. There is no other way out of this hell but through it. Time will do what needs to be done to bring acceptance one day.
Please get to a doctor if you haven't yet. I had too or I could not shake the depression and anxiety that hit me. I took them for a little less than a year and I finally started weeing off of them with the help of my doctor. It will help you get the edge off not necessarily numb you. The meds will help a lot.
As to him not ever loving you, it's a lie. You and your children know that is not true. That is cheater speak coming from his mouth. My X told me that he had no idea what love was. For someone that didn't know what love was, he surely had the Oscar won that year for his incredible performance for 20 of our 21 years, plus the 3.5 we dated.
He is going to spew a lot of nonsense, that is why it is soooooo important not to talk to him at all about anything that doesn't have to do with finances. When you get a lawyer you don't even have to talk about finances or the divorce either. It will all go through your lawyers.
Please remember that he is no award winning actor, you and your children would have known all those years if the love you received was non existent. You guys know better than to believe a cheating liar.