Re: Husband cheating with strippers
An update: Thank you again for all the advice, this forum has been a sanity saver. In our state you have to be separated a yr before you can divorce so that is the plan (mine anyway). We are renting our current place (moved here last summer, it's my hometown area so my family is here), lease up in June & that's when school gets out, so plan is to use next 2 months to find a place for kids & I and get things in order. Waiting to tell kids until schools out- 12 yr old has had a hard time with last move, 1st yr of middle school, etc so think it will be better to wait to tell them.
Husband is being very agreeable with what I want in separation agreement (agrees to handle with minimal atty interference to save $). He knows since I've been a sahm for 12 yrs and all the evidence I have he wld be screwed if it went to court & they wld likely make him pay my fees as well. As far as us- he is all over the place, one day it's I can't make him happy the next it's he'll do whatever it takes to fix it. Problem with fixing it is I still don't think I've gotten whole truth from him & he wants major rug sweeping. "He's a changed man!"-- isn't that nice- 3 weeks after I exposed him he is a new person! He takes no responsibility for his actions, "he needed it", "it helped him", " it will make us better", blah blah. Says he was getting tired of the strip club anyway, well of course he was- he was dating them so why go to the club as much? Seems to forget that he didn't stop his behavior or confess until I exposed his lies!
If we try to discuss he always turns it on me, "what am I doing to change and be warmer towards him." He wants to be with me when I'm happy and flirty but when I am mad he wants to leave. Told him I'm not a fake stripper pretending to want him so he'll open his wallet. So I guess I'm not allowed the normal human emotions that occur when cheated on and if I want him to stay I need to stroke his ego constantly! What a load of ****! And he still thinks the outcome is up to him- that really amuses me!
I don't know what happened to the man I married. Mid life crisis maybe, he's going to be on his own soon enough- can get all the "variety" & "buffet of women" he can handle ( won't have much $ for the strippers though)