36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del) - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
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post #16 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 03:28 PM Thread Starter
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

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Originally Posted by blueinbr View Post
Do you understand your role in making that happen or it is all your wife's fault?
Yes...of course I understand my role in all of this....I am the one that no longer wants to live like this...I'm fairly sure if I didn't bring it up it would of been sweep under the rug....and life would just continue on... I'm no longer willing to accept that...I'm kind of pissed with the lack of support here...it may just be me...

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post #17 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 03:45 PM
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

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Yes...of course I understand my role in all of this....I am the one that no longer wants to live like this...I'm fairly sure if I didn't bring it up it would of been sweep under the rug....and life would just continue on... I'm no longer willing to accept that...I'm kind of pissed with the lack of support here...it may just be me...


Well maybe because your initial post was unclear as to what you want.

The roommate thing is very common in long term marriages.

Are you asking for advice in how to remedy that? Getting pissed at people trying to assist you is not helpful
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post #18 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 04:48 PM Thread Starter
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

Not sure what I'm asking....even knowing the answer to my question (36.5 and my choice) still hurts...I don't want to come across as getting pissed....just kind of aggravated.. lots of things running thru my head....just glad I found this place and have an option...,
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post #19 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 05:19 PM
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

Many of us in LTRs have found ourselves in similar situations. (Been there, went through the roommate thing) Forty plus years now, and loving it.

You know what you won't accept. You need to decide what you want and what you'll do for it. It will have to include putting you and then your relationship first. Not your mom and kids.

How long has it been where it's only about the two of you?


Here read these first. They may help you chose. Get to a meeting too.

A Summary of Dr. Harley's Basic Concepts

His Needs, Her Needs

No More Mr. Nice Guy

Best

"In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing." T.R.

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post #20 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 05:34 PM Thread Starter
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

we lost the empty nesters last August last...both kids "renters moved back within a month of each other last summere....I had to move my mom in Jan 2017...had no choice....no doubt I'm aggravated right now....I pushed for an answer ...I got it....and not willing to accept right now... will have to but nit right this moment... the more I re read this I think I'm completely ****ed up...
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post #21 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 06:03 PM
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

I know what the term "roommates" means, but what does "roommates" mean to you in your relationship... for some it is all else but sex ignoring all the intimacy around them but the physical of varying levels, but thought that without the PIV there is no love... for others it is two entirely separate lives in different beds that intermix maybe for a meal of two through the day/week and that's it.

What does your day/week/month/year as a roommate look like?

नमस्ते 🙏

Last edited by Emerging Buddhist; 04-01-2017 at 10:43 PM. Reason: Mindful Clarification
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post #22 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 06:13 PM Thread Starter
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

no piv...seems like we can't talk to each other...
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post #23 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 06:49 PM
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

Without sarcasm... Do you think she likes to live this way either?

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post #24 of 24 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 06:57 PM
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Re: 36.5 years...M may be over (mods may way want to del)

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no piv...seems like we can't talk to each other...
What is(are) her love language(s)?

I would guess your's is physical touch... do you have another?

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