Is there a good enough reason to divorce??
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Old 01-09-2012, 01:45 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

I have recently heard that someone preached that there's no good enough reason to divorce. Bible scriptures were used to support this.. What are your views because i believe that certain instances do warrant a divorce?
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Old 01-09-2012, 02:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

Don't live your life by the bible, live on your terms.

There is a good reason to divorce in some cases. Here are some:

>physically abusive relationship
>affair
>undermining you

etc

Most of it stems from unhappiness.
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Old 01-09-2012, 02:24 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

I understand where you're coming from...obvious reasons would be abuse or an affair, but what if your partner just doesn't do it for you anymore? What's your story?
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Old 01-09-2012, 03:20 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

I believe that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

I also am of the opinion that most of the "no divorce" scriptures are old-school Hebrew law and/or taken out of context, so I tend to discount those fire and brimstone sermons and their ministers.
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Old 01-09-2012, 06:22 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

What about verbal abuse?
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Old 01-09-2012, 09:25 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

Quote:
Originally Posted by KenCasanova View Post
Don't live your life by the bible, live on your terms.
I think people who insist on "living on their terms" is why we have a 50% divorce rate.

Not to be harsh dude, but if the OP is a believer, that's not good advice.

/edit: the Old Testament does allow for divorce, however the NT forbids it unless one spouse abandons the other, or there's some kind of sexual betrayal.

Verses to support, in case you're interested

Matthew 19:9
Mark 10:9
1 Corinthians 7:10-11

For future reference OP, there's a "spirituality and marriage" subforum here where these questions might be better answered. Here, like anywhere, some folks get put off by religious topics.

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Old 01-10-2012, 04:12 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

Look at the bible. Either Old or New Testament. There are parts that are no longer accepted. With the exception of some middle-eastern nations, a thief no longer has a hand removed. Just one example. Not coming down on religion, but the general movement in religion is to find verses that reinforce the message you are trying to convey. I am well aware of this, as I used to be an ordained minister for 12 years. I would say in matters of abuse (physical, mental, or other) there is a justified reason for it. Infidelity is another.
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Old 01-10-2012, 05:45 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

I agree, and the verses I gave above say as much.
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Old 01-10-2012, 06:01 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I have recently heard that someone preached that there's no good enough reason to divorce. Bible scriptures were used to support this.. What are your views because i believe that certain instances do warrant a divorce?
It's my view that while a valuable collection of historic literature the Bible was written by bronze age goat herders.

I try to use a more rational contemporary approach to how I live my life.

That modern approach easily shows there are a Plethora of perfectly valid reasons for divorce.
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Old 01-10-2012, 06:24 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

Give unto Caesar that which is Caesar's due.
Give to God what is God's due.
Give to one's spouse what one's spouse is due.
When you turn the other cheek, make sure both of them are turned that way...and you'll be walking in the right direction.

I think discernment is important.
Most religions support discernment, and have high clerics of one sort or another to pray/meditate/discern about interpretation.

I mean, hello, if we are going to support scripture in marriage, us women better get our harems sorted out. Everyone who wants to go with Joe, get in this line, everyone going with Bob other line. Guys, you better have some heck of a job, and get to the gym, you'll need the stamina. It is time to divide up the goats and sheep and name your 100 children. Don't forget, if your bro dies you're responsible for his ladies as well.

That's my take on scripture.
And this let you H be the leader in all things stuff - well H's are human, they get brain tumors and diabetes and alzheimer's and addictions. I prefer being your brother's keeper (metaphorically) but nobody said by being born you have to be a martyr in doing that. How are you going to be someone's keeper if they put you 6 feet under or end up in the looney bin? Sometimes the right thing to do is to get out to where the spiritual air is breathable, and circle round the wagons from a better vantage point.

I go with the Mongolian viewpoint, historically speaking. A woman has to agree to the marriage, and if it doesn't work out she's free to leave, with the kids. No reason need be given and there are no tainted reputations for the woman for doing this. Doesn't work out cause the guy's an a**, leave. People get that. And because woman can do it freely, they do, and people get how many guys are not suitable for marriage. In ancient Mongolia, if a guy got left too often, word got around, and nobody would agree to marry him. Plus no kids, so harder time making a living. I think that's a much better system!
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Old 01-10-2012, 06:54 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I have recently heard that someone preached that there's no good enough reason to divorce. Bible scriptures were used to support this.. What are your views because i believe that certain instances do warrant a divorce?
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Old 01-10-2012, 07:04 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is there a good enough reason to divorce??

I think all types of abuse are legitimate reasons for divorce. I think the divorce rate is very high among couples that marry young (under 24) Maybe couples should have to go through a marriage boot camp first.
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