Re: Spouse cheated need advice
First, you should not make up your mind that you want to reconcile right away.
Because in order to consider it, you need several things from her which she many not want or be able to do:
No contact with the AP
Full transparency of all devices to include passwords to messaging accounts and social media
Written timeline of the affair
Agree to attend IC to find out why she allowed this to happen
Go to both of your parents and confess to what she has done
Showing genuine concern not just for saving the marriage AND for how she has hurt you
There is more, and some other experienced posters will be along shortly to give more examples. Without the aforementioned things, she is not a good candidate for reconciliation.
You are now in the process of trying to identify whether or not you want to reconcile, while watching her actions to see if she is a good candidate for reconciliation, AND dealing with the roller coaster of emotions that are sure to come to you. In short, you have your work cut out for you.
Sorry you are here.
"Our ability to feel joy is directly related to how much pain we are willing to feel." - Mavash.
"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for." - Bob Marley