Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: The Frozen North
Re: 24 plus years and I am ready to go
Given what she has said, are you remotely interested in pursuing this marriage? One gets the impression that you are out, and are merely waiting to file for divorce. I believe that if she has awakened, it is way too late. Do whatever is necessary to make yourself safe and secure. If it involves moving back to where your family is, then do so. I recommend a few months of just de-stressing and relaxation. Take stock of your life. By my count, you have spent nearly nine years holding the fort, doing what was necessary while she drank and partied. I wonder how your children view her? Probably not well.
The mentions of a future together are showing that her behavior is beginning to impact her. She sees you with a foot out the door. At 47 her options for a future are not quite what they were at 37 and really not there like they were at 27. She pushes you out the door, and at the last second, whooopsie, I need someone to care for me in my old age. Uh-oh, I partied, he stayed home, I got nothing, he has family, and integrity and ... he is out the door, onto a new life without me, and and and and....I FU*KED UP! I have nobody. I have a job I hate, no marriage and the closest thing I have to family are the drunks I hang out with. At 47, her looks are going, she has an alcohol habit, she is likely going to suffer cognitive impairment from years of heavy drinking and she does not have a husband any longer. She did it to herself, too bad, so sad.
Good luck on your new life. I hope it kicks ass.