Married 6 years, now there's no connection

hrphoto73 · 02-13-2012, 05:52 AM

I'm figuring the result should be divorce, but here's what's going on:

In March, we'll have been married 6 years. been together about 8 years. 2 kids, her pre-teen son from previous marriage and our 3 year old. We live in a city, it's nice but I feel claustraphobic. I would like to move to a smaller town, and she has no interest. My relationship with her son is strained, and to be honest I just don't care. I would do anything for my son, though she makes comments that I ignore him at times.

We rarely make love or are intimate, though I certainly try. She constantly pushes me away. I know a big portion of this has to do with my relationship with her son.

I have asked several times for us to meet with mediator, but she won't agree.

I am from a divorced family, and we have both already been thru 1 divorce. I don't want to put my son thru that, but not sure what else to do. We have been to counseling before, however it sounds like she needs to make some changes more than me. Now neither of us is interested in going back.

Any advice?
Posted via Mobile Device

accept · 02-13-2012, 06:23 AM

If you both dont want to stay together which it sounds like its best to separate. I believe that in these difficult situations with previous marriages and children if one starts badly there is no going back. You dont say how long your 'troubles' have been. Most likely a long time. At least your better prepared for the next time.

asylumspadez · 02-14-2012, 01:31 PM

You two got married while your relationship was still young and its now coming back to bite you in the ass. Both of you ,imo, need to make changes. You need to be more accepting of your step-son, Try to talk with him more and do activities with him, Try to bond more with him. Also your wife needs to be more accepting. Having a step-child isnt easy and it takes time to really bond with one. Try a romantic getaway as well. Drop the kids off at your parents place or something and have a weekend alone with your wife. Maybe this can bring your love life back.

If you want to save your marriage then both of you need to put effort into it.