Re: What does, "I'm not happy" really mean?
"But I really don't believe he was ready for marriage. " Add a new child to the mix, and you think he's ready for parenthood, even if you say he is great with her. He better be.. and you say he's a nice guy. But Parenting means a WHOLE lot more than that!
"The fact is, we're married and coming in after 3:30-4a.m. is a single man's behavior... I never know where he's going or when he's coming back.
I don't know if there's someone else."
He may be feeling left behind, may be feeling that while he would love to be a father, loves his daughter, but is not now happy because he is selfish. Period. I'm sure there was a lot of "fun" he and you were having when it was just the two of you. But in the back of your mind, maybe he wasn't ready. He might feel your marriage is now secondary. He might see an opportunity to blow this up, by being an *******, because he's not getting what he wants. And above all he's doing all this so he can "feel" again.
By the way, this was me in my late 20's (first wife). Complete *******. This is unacceptable behavior. While I was fantastic with my daughter, I never truly attempted to continue with the marriage. I saw there was a problem, knew it was me, didn't take the blame, went out drank just to numb myself for what I was doing to my family and to feel like I wanted to selfishly feel, all to a wonderful woman who would have done anything for me.
Sorry, I just re-read that and it was harsh. Maybe it's not all that.
But some things to do are, well what you did as a couple. Date night's, different things (maybe to where the appeal is skewed toward him.) I say that because, if it starts as him thinking,"this is lame." It's hard to continue with those practices. And when those lame evening date adventures happen, that's great! Because you can laugh at that one. And while this is going on, hopefully it will diminish his childhood behavior and during this, work on his disrespectful attitude.