I have been married for almost 8 years and my husband is causing me so much stress that I am considering leaving him. I just don't know what to do anymore. Please help me!!
So, here are the basics!!
We have no kids but he does have 2 kids from a previous marriage (15 & 17). His ex wife is remarried but she is still very difficult to deal with. I never knew that marrying someone with kids could be so hard, however that is not why I am so upset.
The thing I am most upset about is that I found out recently my husband has charged up 37,000 in debt!! This has occured over the last two years. I am so disappointed. He owns his own business but I knew that he hadn't been doing everything he could to make sure it was doing well. He has been slacking off but I had no idea how much. I knew he had gotten "lazy" but I didn't know it was this bad. Even though he was severely in debt, he continued to race go karts!! :scratchhead:
Two weeks ago he registered for a race and registration alone was 1300! That doesn't include all of the other stuff. How could have he registered for a race knowing how much debt he was in???
By the way, in case you are wondering, we have seperate checking accounts. We both wanted that.
Here is the kicker! I own a business as well and am pretty successful. I have been paying the whole house payment lately (for the past 4-5 months) because he kept saying he was "low on cash". I feel like I was being used because he knew I would pay the bills. Oh, and I also picked up paying the water, electric, and gas bills.
Also, and this really irriatates me!! My husband has not done the taxes yet on his business. So, we haven't even been able to do our personal taxes yet and it is August!!! That is just ridiculous.
I feel like his priority is himself! He only cares about himself and racing. Now, he is saying he will get himself out of this mess but most of us know that when you are in that much debt, you are in pretty deep and it is virtually impossible to get out of it.
Oh, and here are some other issues. We barely have sex! He has an ED problem I guess but wouldn't even go talk to anyone about it until recently. His blood work did show really low levels of stuff so I believe him but our sex life sucks!!! It is the worst!
And, when we do have fun, he wants me to be on top and for him to be covered up because he gets cold!! I mean, come on are you serious???
We thought recently (before all of this) about trying to have a baby. Come to find out, his analysis was horrible. Everything was poor: poor count, poor swimmers, abnormal looking. So, if we even wanted a kid, we would need to do ivf.
I know it seems like I am bashing him so I will take a few minutes to say the good things. Overall, he is a good guy. He is not mean to me, doesn't drink or smoke, and he can be fun to be around. I care deeply for him as a person and would do anything in the world for him but I just don't know if I can take this anymore. I am so unhappy and when I look at him, I just feel angry.
So, here are the basics!!
We have no kids but he does have 2 kids from a previous marriage (15 & 17). His ex wife is remarried but she is still very difficult to deal with. I never knew that marrying someone with kids could be so hard, however that is not why I am so upset.
The thing I am most upset about is that I found out recently my husband has charged up 37,000 in debt!! This has occured over the last two years. I am so disappointed. He owns his own business but I knew that he hadn't been doing everything he could to make sure it was doing well. He has been slacking off but I had no idea how much. I knew he had gotten "lazy" but I didn't know it was this bad. Even though he was severely in debt, he continued to race go karts!! :scratchhead:
Two weeks ago he registered for a race and registration alone was 1300! That doesn't include all of the other stuff. How could have he registered for a race knowing how much debt he was in???
By the way, in case you are wondering, we have seperate checking accounts. We both wanted that.
Here is the kicker! I own a business as well and am pretty successful. I have been paying the whole house payment lately (for the past 4-5 months) because he kept saying he was "low on cash". I feel like I was being used because he knew I would pay the bills. Oh, and I also picked up paying the water, electric, and gas bills.
Also, and this really irriatates me!! My husband has not done the taxes yet on his business. So, we haven't even been able to do our personal taxes yet and it is August!!! That is just ridiculous.
I feel like his priority is himself! He only cares about himself and racing. Now, he is saying he will get himself out of this mess but most of us know that when you are in that much debt, you are in pretty deep and it is virtually impossible to get out of it.
Oh, and here are some other issues. We barely have sex! He has an ED problem I guess but wouldn't even go talk to anyone about it until recently. His blood work did show really low levels of stuff so I believe him but our sex life sucks!!! It is the worst!
And, when we do have fun, he wants me to be on top and for him to be covered up because he gets cold!! I mean, come on are you serious???
We thought recently (before all of this) about trying to have a baby. Come to find out, his analysis was horrible. Everything was poor: poor count, poor swimmers, abnormal looking. So, if we even wanted a kid, we would need to do ivf.
I know it seems like I am bashing him so I will take a few minutes to say the good things. Overall, he is a good guy. He is not mean to me, doesn't drink or smoke, and he can be fun to be around. I care deeply for him as a person and would do anything in the world for him but I just don't know if I can take this anymore. I am so unhappy and when I look at him, I just feel angry.