To Many Years To Many Mistakes

Steve16124 · 02-12-2008, 05:20 PM

I have been with my wife for 21 years now....7 married...it has been on the edge many of those years and cheating has been a big part of it with her cheating twice with the same person...The biggest thing I have to complain about is memory loss and immaturity....she is 40 now and acts like she is 18...at the age of 21 she would do, knew more and held the relationship with me just fine....now she can't do the smallest of things....wouldn't take my advice and complains when I get angry because she cost us money that we shouldn't spend on things she was told to avoid.....her relationship with our kids is more of a sister then a mother....they do what they want and if I get in the middle she rewards them behind my back...I've tried all I can.....I don't use anything and would do anything for my family. This is why I spent so many years trying. Counceling never helped, after we quit going she goes back to her self.....medication didn't work.....my only hope is divorce. Just don't want to be without the one I love but can't stand it anymore.....what would you all do...?

sarahdale24 · 02-12-2008, 05:36 PM

How long has this been going on? Could it be a mid-life crisis?

I ask because my step-mom(she adopted us, and was married to my dad for 20yrs) and she left him one day. Left us(even though we were adults) and her son with my dad who was 16 at the time. She told my dad that he made the last 20 years of her life a living hell. (I felt it was directed at me because I was a big part of that 20 years). She was my BFF for a little bit when she turned 40. All my life she was against drinking(my dad used to be a drunk and has sense cleaned up), she used to be against drugs, and partying, etc. And she used to go to church off and on and drag us with her. Today she is doing drugs, living the college life(she's 51) and drinking and all kinds of other stuff. She's been with 3 guys since she left my dad...I feel it may be a mid-life crisis, which I hope thats all it is.

Has this been discussed in your situation?

It got so bad with me that I haven't talked to her in 6 months! This woman was technically my "mother" and I won't ever plan to talk to her again. I'd hate for it to get that bad with you...:-(

Steve16124 · 02-12-2008, 05:50 PM

No... we are still together and at times it is good....just I think my love is going away. this has been an increasing thing....her memory loss is getting worse and her immaturity is real bad......she wears my daughters clothes and just acts like them.....I have had people think she is my daughter, people think my daughter is her mother.....her interests are that of a child including our sex life...I hate to mention that but it is true....responsibility is out in left field and when I discuss this issue she gets mad and doesn't even acknowledge the conversation.....communication has always been a problem...sorta like a teacher working with an 8 year old....
I'm just one that wanted to spend my life with one person, wanted my kids to have one mother/father.....I guess not

sarahdale24 · 02-12-2008, 09:11 PM

sounds like you need to get her evaluated...it could be serious

draconis · 02-12-2008, 09:32 PM

Have her see a psychiatrist, or video tape her strange behavior. She might have a split personality and not even realize it. But having a true professional take a look at her might help her and you IF she is ill.

draconis