my husband should of not been a slag!!
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Talk About Divorce and Separation »Considering Divorce or Separation » my husband should of not been a slag!!

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Old 12-19-2009, 06:34 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default my husband should of not been a slag!!

i am depressed, stressed and upset, i have just had a baby with my new husband, he has 2 kids from a previous relationship which i love dearly and have known from the word go, i accepted them into my life cos i loved my husband. i treat them kids like my own, i had trouble with there mother for the first year or so but we are on speaking terms for the kids sake now. i do admit it was hard accepting the kids but i never let it show, i saw them as a constant reminder of his ex but i got over it and i love em, and they stay over at our home most of the week and i gladly look after them whilst my husband works. but the problem now is another child has crawled out of the woodworks with a one night stand he had when he was 18, her mother threatned to stab me in my belly when i was pregnant, the 8 year old daughter called me a ***** on facebook....excuse me that is my husband he should of worn a friggin condom!! i get abuse of them that bad i have deleted my facebook account. we were amicable and requested a dna test but the mother was havin none of it, now the CSA has contacted us and say he owes 9grand in child support for her, he aint on the birth certificate but they say cos he never replied to letters that were sent to a previous address were he aint lived in 11 years!! the kid is deemed his! i dont think that is right i could say tom cruise is my kids father just cos i bloody well say so! lol but they eventually rang us back (the csa) n said they will get her to do a dna test, now iv bored u with all the details, my problem is i dont no if i can cope with this woman n kid n our life if it is his child, i cant bear it it gets me so angry and upset that his past keeps comin to bite us in our ass everytime i think were goin to be happy,they are violent chavs and i dont want my poor lil girl who is only 3 months submitted to this, she dont deserve it. i need your help!! any advice....should i just leave, this would be heartbreaking cos i love him so much but is it for the best for me and my daughter??
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Old 12-19-2009, 08:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: my husband should of not been a slag!!

If she was confident about the paternity she would have agreed to dna asap. Give him the benefit of the doubt UNTIL you have the dna results. THEN decide. If you are mean to him now and it turns out he is not the father you will feel guilty and he will be angry with you.

DNA will be quick if she is confident - and slow if she has real doubts about paternity.

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Originally Posted by stressed5225 View Post
i am depressed, stressed and upset, i have just had a baby with my new husband, he has 2 kids from a previous relationship which i love dearly and have known from the word go, i accepted them into my life cos i loved my husband. i treat them kids like my own, i had trouble with there mother for the first year or so but we are on speaking terms for the kids sake now. i do admit it was hard accepting the kids but i never let it show, i saw them as a constant reminder of his ex but i got over it and i love em, and they stay over at our home most of the week and i gladly look after them whilst my husband works. but the problem now is another child has crawled out of the woodworks with a one night stand he had when he was 18, her mother threatned to stab me in my belly when i was pregnant, the 8 year old daughter called me a ***** on facebook....excuse me that is my husband he should of worn a friggin condom!! i get abuse of them that bad i have deleted my facebook account. we were amicable and requested a dna test but the mother was havin none of it, now the CSA has contacted us and say he owes 9grand in child support for her, he aint on the birth certificate but they say cos he never replied to letters that were sent to a previous address were he aint lived in 11 years!! the kid is deemed his! i dont think that is right i could say tom cruise is my kids father just cos i bloody well say so! lol but they eventually rang us back (the csa) n said they will get her to do a dna test, now iv bored u with all the details, my problem is i dont no if i can cope with this woman n kid n our life if it is his child, i cant bear it it gets me so angry and upset that his past keeps comin to bite us in our ass everytime i think were goin to be happy,they are violent chavs and i dont want my poor lil girl who is only 3 months submitted to this, she dont deserve it. i need your help!! any advice....should i just leave, this would be heartbreaking cos i love him so much but is it for the best for me and my daughter??
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Old 12-19-2009, 10:28 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: my husband should of not been a slag!!

Yeah DNA test asap. Not a penny until that is done.

Phew... makes me glad for my very boring sex life before I got married.
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