Infidelity is a life changing event for everyone involved with scars that last a lifetime. A question for both the WS and the BS - how has infidelity changed your life? Your kids lives? Your friendships and other relationships? Your job? I am curious just how far reaching the impact of infidelity has on someones life.
Well, here's the short list.
My kids
Their grades have slipped
They are insecure about their futures and filled with uncertainty
They are depressed and spend a lot more time in there rooms.
They are not the same care free children they were before
My job
My performance has suffered since DD
It is harder to concentrate on business
My energy level is lower
My co-workers picked up the slack for me during the early days
I have gotten better gradually
Physically
I have aged
Hair is thinner and greyer
I lost a lot of weight initially but have gained most of it back
I just look older in general…stress.
Emotionally
I no longer trust people, even guy friends. I am suspicious of their motives
It takes a lot longer to warm up to strangers
I do not trust women. I see them as all as future cheaters
I can't get close emotionally. I see red flags everywhere after only a couple of dates.
I doubt I will ever marry again which is sad because I loved being married.
I am still bitter and pessimistic in general
I have lost interest in most things that I enjoyed before DD…hobbies, etc
I find myself questioning my faith which I never did before
I just turned 50. This would not have bothered me before…but now it does
That's just off the top of my head.
Keep in mind that my first wife cheated on me as well, many years ago. I was hurt deeply by this and divorced her immediately. I recovered but I was emotionally scarred. When my XWW #2 cheated, knowing the pain I experienced from XWW #1's cheating…I was destroyed.
The effect on me may sound rather extreme but remember I've had a double dose of infidelity in my life. The only 2 women I have ever loved…both betrayed me