Does the hurt ever go away!?
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Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

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Old 06-10-2010, 12:41 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Does the hurt ever go away!?

Sometimes I think I'm okay. Then, out of nowhere I will be overcome by images of my husband with the other women. It doesn't matter what he does, I still see those images. They cripple me every time. It's such an intense pain, physical pain. I cannot imagine it ever not hurting.
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Old 06-10-2010, 04:09 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Does the hurt ever go away!?

I feel your pain. While nothing physical ever happened between my wife and the other man, the online conversations I read were more than enough to spark the same sort of images you describe.

Things such as, "When we showered together, I was only thinking of you" really bring bad thoughts anytime I'm around my wife for an extended period of time.
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Old 06-10-2010, 06:42 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Does the hurt ever go away!?

Run that by me one more time land2634...

While nothing physical ever happened between my wife and the other man... When we showered together, I was only thinking of you"

Honestly, unless he was referring to a shower he took in his 8th grade gym class; something happened. Generally, the reason men and women shower together isn't to conserve water and save the planet.

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Old 06-10-2010, 07:16 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Does the hurt ever go away!?

hi there,
I think what you are feeling is pretty normal for a while, I do the same thing, it's been 6 months for me.
I feel like my heart will explode sometimes......I'm trying not to think of him and her together, it does me no good....
My husband is remorseful and he is being the best husband I could ask for now......
I refuse to let a 3 month affair ruin a 26 year relationship, just try to re-direct your thoughts, change what you are doing, call someone......
I'm hoping that somewhere down the road the thoughts go away.....
Maybe someone further down the road can enlighten us both....
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Old 06-11-2010, 06:44 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Does the hurt ever go away!?

Hi there, I am in a the exact same spot you are. The pain just comes over me sometimes and it hurts soooooo bad! But what I found works really well is to mentally knock myself out of it. It takes work, but it can be done. When you feel the pain consuming your brain, instantly try as hard as you can to think of something else, something positive. I know its tough, but trust me, I have been drug through the mud and it does go away, slowly but surely it WILL go away. So hang in there, you CAN do it!!!
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Old 06-19-2010, 10:07 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Does the hurt ever go away!?

It gets better. If you feel up to reading it, my blog, After His Affair chronicles the emotional turmoil I have dealt with over the past 6 months.

Best,

Lyn
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