Talk About Marriage banner
Status
Not open for further replies.

She asked me out.

105K views 262 replies 79 participants last post by  ButtPunch 
#1 ·
So, just like 10 minutes ago I got a call from her. It was pertaining to our kid and then she asked me out on a date, lol. Now, she has been trying to bang me for months. It started on D-day and it really hasn't stopped. Although the last few weeks leading up to a divorce- (that was finalized last week) she was going from angry super diva b!tch on wheels too, I can't live without you I need you type person. So... Yeah. Now I said, "on your dollar homeslice, I might consider it". And she said, "Well yeah, silly bear that's why I'm asking you". I said "where"? and she was like "anywhere you want" So I said a restaurant that is five star and famous. And she agreed.

Now, I'm not inclined to miss out on a 5 star meal. I mean for a lonely ole' civil servant that maybe pulls in 50 grand a year, this sounds pretty good. And plus, I think I just need to bang her out a bit. Really, I can't think of any reason not to do this. Divorce is done and done. Marriage is dissolved.

So.... Yeah, I think it's a great idea.

So TAM. Am I in the clear here. Or am I batsh!t nuts just like my ex, lol.

Thoughts?

I know this opening doors for crazy stuff to happen. But in all honesty, I do really, really miss her.
 
See less See more
#4 ·
well I guess it depends, on your intentions and if she is aware, if she was just your ex but there were no kids involved I would tell you, sure man do whatever you want.

but like you are going to have a relationship with her related to your kid for the rest of your life, I will tell you, be careful in what she expects from you a be honest in your intentions.

if the most you can offer is a FWB or if you really think that in the future reconcilation is possible be honest about it, if she is agrees with whatever you propose then no problem, but if she is expecting something different from you, be carefull you don't want to make this woman your enemy or make her resent you, after all she still can make your life difficult regarding your kid
 
#10 ·
Thanks all for your replies and support. Few things.

- she is not dating

- OM is out of the picture. He his getting divorced and taken to the cleaners- righteous pay back. This is why you always. ALWAYS tell the other spouse. The. set back and watch the show, lulz.

- She knows I've been playing the field. I'd say somewhere between 11 or 12 chicks. Nothing serious. I just am what I am. A player. Always was. This will not change. She is going to have to win ME back and prove to me she's loyal and not a cheating ho.

-I am not paying for it. She is.

- I don't really care if she dates other men. Just as long as she doesn't bring them around our kid for at least 1 year- this was in the custody agreements for both parties. My son doesn't know what his dad does when he's with his mom. I will not bring women in and out of his life. And his mother will do the same.

- I am still very, very attracted to my wife. And I feel I'm entitled to a few things now that Divorce is finalized, lol. Well.... More than a few. If you get my drift.;);)

- She knows this doesn't mean that we are dating. I think she just wants me. The level of "f*ck me now" vibes I've gotten from her since D-day are incredible. This is just the latest and most blunt.

- Like I said many, many times. I still love her. She's not a bad person. She handled this divorce in a pretty much awesome way. She's a good mother and a BEAUTIFUL and sexy as f*ck woman. I mean, I can't blame scumbag OM for taking the bait. She's super fine. And I'm going to take what I want.

Thanks TAM. I'll tell her it's on.

Crazy, crazy last year or so. Just nuts.

Is it odd that I feel better than I have in weeks?

So much for minimal contact just about the kid huh, lulz.

Thanks TAM.
 
#19 ·
- She knows I've been playing the field. I'd say somewhere between 11 or 12 chicks. Nothing serious. I just am what I am. A player. Always was. This will not change.
Flood, just one question if you don't mind, brought to mind by the quote from your post.

Somewhere in your main thread you mentioned that in the past you had occasionally played the role of OM with married women. Since you are back to playing the field, how will you handle these situations now, after your experience with a WW?
 
#14 · (Edited)
Have a nice meal. Try to get into he head. Determine if she is just in it for the sex, and not trying to set you up. If she says she wants to be exclusive FWB tell her no way. Tell her you won't mind sleeping with her but you have no intentions of stopping dating other women. Make her understand she is now just one in a gallery of contenders and that if she wants you to herself she will have to step up her game.

He answer will let you know if she is serious or if she is screwing with your mind.
 
#15 ·
I know this opening doors for crazy stuff to happen. But in all honesty, I do really, really miss her.
I'm not worried about you going out for an expensive dinner and perhaps some frolics afterwards.

"But in all honesty, I do really, really miss her."
But dang! . . . I just wish you hadn't said that.
"I miss her". Not good.
"I really miss her." Worse.
"I really really miss her". Now we have a 'situation'.

I didn't read your thread so I don't know what she did. Whatever it was ended in divorce.
You're right. Some crazy stuff might start happening in that brain of yours.
And TAM is always here if it does. :D
 
#23 ·
Many people have remarried after a divorce and had a good marriage.

I would not rush back into a marriage with WW.

Though I see no problem with dating her. Though she has to be 100% transparent with you and do everything as if she was recovering the marriage.

This is a must to show you that she has learned how to affair proof her life post D day.
 
#24 ·
So, just like 10 minutes ago I got a call from her. It was pertaining to our kid and then she asked me out on a date, lol. Now, she has been trying to bang me for months. It started on D-day and it really hasn't stopped. Although the last few weeks leading up to a divorce- (that was finalized last week) she was going from angry super diva b!tch on wheels too, I can't live without you I need you type person. So... Yeah. Now I said, "on your dollar homeslice, I might consider it". And she said, "Well yeah, silly bear that's why I'm asking you". I said "where"? and she was like "anywhere you want" So I said a restaurant that is five star and famous. And she agreed.
Bottom line. She's trying to use sex and charm to win you back. She's playing the player and you're falling for it. She might have lost the divorce battle but she's slowly winning the war. She's even got you making excuses for the OM. Why? If she's as hot as you claim she is then she will always have guys hitting on her. So she's responsible for keeping it in her pants. She sold you out and you're starting to forget that cause you're in a fog over her.


Now, I'm not inclined to miss out on a 5 star meal. I mean for a lonely ole' civil servant that maybe pulls in 50 grand a year, this sounds pretty good. And plus, I think I just need to bang her out a bit. Really, I can't think of any reason not to do this. Divorce is done and done. Marriage is dissolved.

So.... Yeah, I think it's a great idea.
It's really not a good idea. You said it yourself the divorce did not bring you closure. This will only reverse any progress you've already made. It you could handle it then I'd say go for it but you're obviously still hung up on her so you clearly can't.


So TAM. Am I in the clear here. Or am I batsh!t nuts just like my ex, lol.

Thoughts?

I know this opening doors for crazy stuff to happen. But in all honesty, I do really, really miss her.
Again, this is the problem... You still haven't detached from her and there is no way you can just start banging her without it messing with your head and making things more painful for you emotionally. In the end, it's up to you, just be prepared for it to hurt you more cause you'll start getting all sentimental then that'll trigger you to remember what she did and you'll be back on the emotional rollercoaster.

My advice go keep banging random chicks till you find one whose a keeper. She won't ever change the question is will you?
 
#25 ·
It was coming, we just needed to read your other threads. Let's face, you are considering giving her a second chance.

Just be careful, guard your heart, think with the right head, watch her from afar, whether she's doing the very much needed internal changes to affair proof herself (hopely lastings, permanent) and try to not pay atttention to the most "superficial" stuff like she still loves or desires you (which always can change, she still loved you and wanted you yet she cheated).
 
#32 ·
Flood,
I read all three of your posts last night. I would die if I found pictures of my spouse doing those things to someone else. For me that would never change. I don't care how hot she was. There is no way in my mind she would ever be hot to me again. You have to do what you think is right for your and what you want to do.

There is just no way in hell she would even get a date with me again. I would be like thanks but no thanks. You cheated and you lost. That's your problem not mine.

I resolved my problem. I divorced you.

Clay

Just my thoughts.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
You have insufficient privileges to reply here.
Top