I take it that you guys don't seem to like this idea of being together as a family in any context? Wife read these suggestions from info obtained at the parenting class we both have to attend. Obviously I haven't gone but I watched as she read along from this info. Are you saying it's not a good idea or that it won't turn out the way it's designed. The messages seem somewhat confusing. Please clarify...
My guess is that your wife thinks that you two can divorce and yet you will continue to be available to her for meeting some needs (like mowing her lawn "for your daughter") and continue to still have Christmas and Easter together "for your daughter." It's like a form of fence-sitting: not wanting to commit to staying and working but not wanting to entirely cut all ties either.
The concept as a theory is nice, but isn't honestly very practical or realistic for the reasons that Dear Hubby gave. In real life, if you two divorce, you or your ex are no longer a "family unit"--so you may move to another state, you may meet and marry another lady, she may meet and marry another man...and chances are that 2nd wife will not much appreciate you having Christmas with the ex "for your daughter"--especially if you have children with 2nd wife! Furthermore, if you two divorce, it's not really very healthy for either one of you to "hang onto each other" that way and just continue carrying on. Divorce *means* that you two are apart. So "working together civilly, coordinating visitation schedules in a business-like manner" is realistic, but "spending time together as a family, having dinners and holidays together" probably just is not.
Does that make more sense? It's not so much that we're "against" it, but rather that even in a relatively friendly divorce, once you divorce both parties gradually move apart and carry on with separate lives. Thinking/expecting to continue behaving "as if" you're a family would be confusing.
I also found out today through an attorney that I don't have to do anything until I'm forced to do something. I didn't know so it makes me feel better knowing I don't want to do anything.
Naturally be sure to confirm this with your attorney, but it is my understanding that once divorce papers are actually filed and you are served, that there is a deadline to reply. To be precise, most states require that from the date you are served, you have 30 days to respond. If you do NOT respond, then the divorce will go 100% as she put in the filing. If you DO respond within that timeframe, you can ask for what you want, ask for a delay, ask for a court order for counseling, etc. So if you do not want the divorce, and she files and has you served, you can not ignore it "because you don't want to divorce." You would be "forced" to reply within 30 days. Does that make sense?