If you are confident the art teacher is the POSOM, then just follow him after his class and see if he leads you to her. This helps you avoid your wife recognizing your car. I am assuming the POSOM wouldn't know your car?
As for tracking down his fiancé, did you google his name and engagement? Might be posted on a local paper website etc. you could also try to see if you can get it by visiting his Facebook page and poking around. You definitely want this info on hand, so you can swiftly blow up his world.
don't confront until you get the intel on the OM fianace'....confront after you expose this...you'll have a better chance of pulling her out of the affair fog when the OM throws your old lady under the bus to save his own @ss.
I do how ever would recommend confronting if you see them checking into a motel.
At the very least if you catch them hugging and kissing you can now say you have the smoking gun to make a plan and work the plan.
If you do witness something so painful you might want to step back and regroup.....again once its verified you now have the smoking gun that will dictate your next course of action.
Right now we all assuming she is cheating, but if she is then you have alot of work to do in preparing for a more effective confrontation. one that will sting a lot worse then a jealous husband making a seen on the OM ground.
In short confront on your term and on your ground.
I think following the teacher is probably the best way to go. He doesn't know what I look like nor the car I drive.
I suspect that whatever happens... God I hate thinking about this. Whatever happens, happens at the school. They have a 2 hour window to do whatever that is. Not very much time to go anywhere, BUT I know he lives close to the school. He is the owner of the school, so I'm sure after all classes clear out they would have the place to themselves.
I feel sick...
I don't believe it's a classmate, everything tells me it's this guy.
I've googled his name + engagement and found nothing. I've poked around his facebook for hours and found nothing. I'm sure there is a way I can track down who his fiance is, I just haven't figured it out yet.
I guess doing something is good for you, so like some said: rent a car
But wear glasses, a scarf, a baseball cap, and keep a low profile. Have a map at and to add a reason to be there and keep even more concealed behind it if necessary?
It’s a bit out there, but another… You have a smart phone yes? I know there are apps that can track its location and store it. “Accidentally” leave it in her car. Then review later where your phone went. You can also set it to record conversations (there must be an app for that too). It’s a poor boy spy tool. Even if she finds it, thank her because you couldn’t find it and wondered if you dropped in her car helping “unloading groceries” (or whatever reason you might have for getting in her car)… Just set it to silent, no vibe, and the screen to power saver so it doesn’t light up. I’ve heard of betrayed buying a new cellphone and loading it up with all sorts of apps and sticking it in the car; A lot even have convenience power jacks in places like the cubbies in the back of a SUV….
Also, instead of renting, talk to a friend and swap cars for the day. Bring a camera or camcorder to gather evidence. Don’t bring any weapons, duct tape, lime and a shovel; Stalker laws are nasty where it just has to look like you might be up to no good. And don’t expect to find anything. More often than not, my SA-WW wasn’t doing anything wrong. So look for those days when there’s something like a girl’s night or she’s working late that isn’t part of a normal routine.
If this was my operation... for lack of a better term... I would...
1. Rent a car
2. disguise myself
3. follow her
4. have fiancee info ahead of time
5. do not confront, photograph instead if possible
6. retreat to get emotions under control first... THEN decide course of action, possibly even to the point of staying at someone elses house OR take sleeping pills so that your emotions are not seen by her until YOU have had time to think and plan.
The day I discovered mutual texts and mutual pic exchange between my H and his AP, I "went to my barn to feed my horses," told him I was just not feeling well when he asked what was wrong with me... then I went to a girl friends house to vent my emotions before confronting him.... went home and confronted and he spilled the beans..
The thing is if you go off in public and act like a mad man it just justifies the affair by making you out to be the bad husband that is uncontrolable.
Don't give her any ammo on why she is doing what she is doing. Think rationally and make a plan that will work best for you in the long run....
This is so true not to mention the risk of escalation of someone throwing punches and getting you arrested.... you HAVE to retreat first... Protect YOUR OWN PERSONAL RECORD... avoid any escalation.
if you can get find my friends installed on her phone you can one way track her with that. but it is only realtime but it is free. you just need time with her phone and yours. install the app on both phones invite yourself to be permanently allowed to see her location on your phone and then give it back. Sticking the app in a rarely used folder will keep the app hidden well enough.
So I went to the school, I didn’t see my wife, I did see the art teacher but decided not to follow him. When I got home my wife was already home. I pulled the VAR, I didn’t find anything.
However… I’ve continued to monitor Whatsapp to track her activity, she hasn’t used it for two weeks. The last time was on a Tuesday. Now today is Teusday, and it just so happens the next level class starts today, guess who logs into Whatsapp this morning…
She must only speak to one person on this app, because she rarely uses it. I haven’t spoken with her since this morning, nor has she mentioned anything about taking the next level class. I’m going to call her shortly to see if she’d like to eat out this evening.
I was pretty certain nothing was going on, that’s why I haven’t posted anything recently, but now I’m not so sure.
Where was she? Already home? Something sounds very odd...
Did y'all talk about where she had been or if she had had class?
I would GPS her car somehow... if she is texting in the car it's not going to show up on VAR... only if he joins her in her car..
has she been "sweaty" these past couple of weeks?
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