I see a lot about people saying he doesn't know what he talks about. Forget him. Look just at the issues he raises and let's open a dialogue about them here where we tam'ers might have a better touch with the real world of infidelity. ...
I fell into this trap and allowed my wife to go to slippery slopes, and she fell.
Though I will also agree there are those who are more likely to fall, but no one is immune.
Thoughts.?
I really don't think there's much to discuss.
Either you maintain dignity and respect for
a. your spouse
b. your family
c. yourself
or you don't.
You either choose to
a. find a way to resolve your sexual differences with your spouse
b. find a way to resolve your sexual differences without your spouse
lying, sneaking around, and cheating is option b. I think we can all agree that promiscuous behavior brings toxicity into the home no one here would advocate? Can we agree that any kind of promiscuous behavior DOES have implications for the home that this moron in this article sidesteps? We read it every day here. Too bad that PhD [cough] didn't bother spending even ONE DAY on a marriage support forum or he would know that.
Promiscuous behavior is not a viable alternative to a fulfilling sex life.
It really is that simple.
This whole discussion is ridiculous in my opinion.
Resorting to promiscuous behavior to satisfy your sexual urges is akin to robbing a liquor store to pay your mortgage.
Sorry, but if you are short of cash, you would do best to find a way to pay your expenses
without breaking the law.
What bugs me about this article is this moron has this idea that infidelity is an either-or situation.
It's not.
He has this idea in his head that you either
a. cheat
b. or go without
And he's oversimplified the discussion into those terms and examines the moral implications til he turns blue.
He's a philosopher I get it.
Here in the REAL world we examine ALL the implications, not just the ones that we find interesting from a philosophy standpoint.
If you value, respect, and maintain dignity for your spouse, family, and marriage, you will find a way to resolve your differences without resorting to sacrificing that respect and dignity you have for your spouse, family, and marriage.
You find a way to make it work within the marriage OR you file for divorce and exit the marriage, family, and relationship with yours and your spouse's dignity in tact.
If you accept that premise, his whole article is just a pointless discussion.